♥ Maizura's smelly shahshah.

2010-10-08T11:21:00.000+08:00

moved again to...

wildwildnothings.tumblr.com

2010-05-10T21:48:00.001+08:00

MOVED TO TUMBLRRRR!

oldsoulyouthfulbody.tumblr.com

2010-05-02T10:58:00.006+08:00

MOVING OUT.
wanna delete this blog soon, like be anonymous for awhile. if you have noticed, i have changed my name at facebook. i just feel that my privacy is at stake, especially if you have relatives on facebook who will tell on you by calling up your mom during work, just to fish out every single detail of your friggin life. what the fuck is wrong with this malay muslim society, seriously, annoying. i know i will never be one of those nosey, with over-the-top makeup and drag-queen-like dressing and pretentious and arrogant aunties in the phuture. i dont geddit, you wear the headscarf so as to not attract the males, then what the fuck with the elaborate dressing and super thick makeup??? hello, women, you ever heard of this thing called logic? hmm, i realise im very frank in my opnions, oh fuck, whatever bitches/haters~ anyhow,do connect with me at my new joint,ahahah.

DO YOUR THING AND FUCK THE REST.

2010-04-30T14:44:00.002+08:00

just finished exams, finally. here at starbucks with the boyfriend, had some amazing Belgian waffles topped with velvety Lurpak slightly salted butter, and complemented with chocolate cream chip frappucinno, sprnkled with chocolate powder and dropped in some M& Ms. spent two days with him before he goes off to work. i dont know if its just me, ut he just seem to to getting sexier everytime i see him teeheehee. okay, thats enough, unecessary info. now i shall savour this little time left i have with him before he goes off to serve the nation. ciao~

2010-04-16T23:26:00.002+08:00

i will be posted to maris stella high for practicum.
how shall i describe how i feel, hmm, nervous and scared at the same time.
went window shopping with boyfriend just now for some proper 'teacher' clothes.
which turned out to be a major failure cos i cannot strike a balance between
too formal and informal.
ho hum.

2010-04-10T12:39:00.003+08:00

'I wanna go watch The Stereophonics.',

said the girl who always procrastinates when it comes to watching concerts,

often because she has no willing friend to go with or

either that they don't share the same music taste or passion as she does

or it would be unfair to drag the boyfriend along due to his meagre NS allowance
or she is awfully stingy with her money,

and so the whole cycle happens again where she will regret to herself

that she has already missed the chance to watch these cool people perform live;

Paramore, Au Revoir Simone, Le Castle Vania, The All American Rejects,
Steve Aoki and many many more

whatever is the matter with me, dammit.

2010-03-12T11:16:00.008+08:00

school is getting more hectic at the moment and assignments and tutorials are piling up. but still, i always look forward to biology lectures with the bio clique, funny we call ourselves that. lmao.

im currently hooked on example's songs, its so groovy! clubbing mood up up. i think i shouldnt procrastinate anymore, i mean i have deprived myself from partaying for like, four months alrdy. dammit. i have to step into the dancefloor by the time im having the 4 month long school break. you know, they always say, if you want something, you gotta do something about it, rather than procastinate till god knows when. so i have to switch my Arabic classes to any other day except Wednesday nights cos its ladies night baby! annoying Arabic shit, getting in my way of life.

if only i have the same enthusiasm for starting on the english assignment as for partying. dorts. dude, seriously it's really hard to teach english. i really appreciate my english teachers in secondary school more now. hmm. maybe i will start on the assignment tomorrow cos i wanna go on a car trip with the boyfriend to the barrage later yaw. procrastinating again....ha ha haw!

2010-03-05T23:10:00.006+08:00

' If you fear that they (your wives) will reject you, admonish them and remove them to another bed; firmly beat them. If they obey you, then worry no more. God is high and great.'

I've been feeling so restless nowadays, thinking about things like these, like how a Muslim man can practise polygamy. It bothers me a great deal, it irks and irritates me. I ask myself, as I feel like i'm losing my faith and I can't bear the injustice to fellow Muslim women in other parts of the world. why, why do we not get protection from being hurt both physically and mentally? I'm so emotionally disturbed nowadays I don't know what to do. How can you expect me to hold onto a faith with many so called rules that I strongly object to? It's messing with my mind and I can't take it if another woman is not being treated right. Just because I show my hair, my wrists, my lips to men, does not mean I am trying to seduce men nor am I inviting men to rape me. And how can polygamy be okay unless you are totally okay with your father having another younger wife? How about all the trust and commitment a wife puts into the marriage and to let it all go for someone else? You think it's all just about pro-creation? How much hurt and denial must a woman endure? I feel so angry, even angrier that I cannot do anything about it. It's frustrating when people try to debate with me that these 'rules' are acceptable and okay. It is not okay, you are not that woman going through this. What it feels like to be the weaker and vulnerable sex and even your own husband and faith cannot protect you. Screw it if I'm doomed to go hell for saying all these, but my conscience is clear. Think about it, there are Muslim girls out there being raped and not getting their justice served because of some 'rule' that she needs at least five witnesses, or the number of Muslim girls being killed by the Taliban for going school. How can everything be okay? What person are you?

Last but not least, this is not meant to offend anyone or any Muslim in particular. I am a Muslim woman myself, just expressing my anger here. And most importantly, I don't need your freaking opinion (s), unless you agree with me of course! sheesh, feel abit better now.

2010-02-13T09:22:00.006+08:00

I had the best birthday surprise from my fellow biology teachers last night. At first, I thought everybody has forgotten all about it already. I mean, the ignored messages and the shrugging off of my desperate attempts to hint them. was left feeling disappointed. so on my birthday, went over to boyfriend's place to help him out with some photography shit and headed home. checked my mobile, but nope, still no messages. giving up, i decided to just sleep the whole day.

by evening i was woken up by my sister to accompany her to the bank and she was acting all weird by magically disappearing along the way. got myself a bubble tea drink to make myself feel better, and headed home. and when i opened the door, the house was pitch black and I was thinking, this must be a blackout until i caught a glimpse of orange light drawing nearer to me but was overshadowed by these huge black figures. I was taken aback till i heard the familiar tune of happy birthday and when the candlelight finally lit up everybody's faces, i was already shaking and teary to see my friends here, in my very own home!

homg, they actually travelled all the way from the other end of the country to come to my place and some rushed from school to be here. I was so touched, hugged everyone. I feel so much love and so blessed I have met these people. so glad all of them came into my life and I never thought anyone would ever do this for me.

gonna meet the boyfriend in the late afternoon, apparently, he has something up for me. the best feeling in the world is loving someone and to have that someone to love you back. im feeling so blessed now, so grateful. and not forgetting my beloved sister, who planned this surprise perfectly with the nie homies. got me feeling really special, really.

wahaha, dont mean to brag but i now have a real deal shit leather topshop bag from my sister! , sexaayy biker jacket, a freaking tiara and had the best birthday surprise/sister/boyfriend/friends in the world! imma happy bitch, now i just need KESHA to be here and we can dance and get all sexayy with each other:D KESHA, DO YOU HEAR ME? I NEED YOU HERE!! HELLO?

2010-02-02T11:40:00.003+08:00

today the weather is good. my hair is behaving itself. i reached school early to get some work done,and am currently blogging from the library. and i just have to forget to bring my pencil box and the gastric acids are acting up in my stomach. but it's okay, i'm still at peace with myself.

apparently, au revoir simone is gonna perform at the esplanade next month, as part of some Heineken music events shit. hmm....

more importantly, my birthday is coming and i still can't believe that i am no longer gonna be a teenager. shit. smells like old cow spirit~

2010-01-17T13:09:00.006+08:00

accompanied the boyfriend to the ministry of home affairs career exhibition last night. okay, that was a mouthful. actually we sorta had a big fight just before that, but we made up as soon as possible cos i will get very restless and itching to call him up every couple of hours or so, yeah imma crazy bitch. anyway, the exhibition was kinda fun cos we ran around and i keep pestering him to ask for the free goodie bag, which he finally got after much persuasion. and see all the goodies he got like, pens and the cutest red rhino post-it notes! hehe. one day, he is going to be a very fine firefighter, saving the lives of many ungrateful singaporeans. awesome, yay!

what the fuck am im talking about?? soon, half of singapore's population will be made up of foreigners, no doubt about it! so it will be, 50% foreign fuckers , and 50% singaporeans who cant afford to migrate, like myself. double yay! how awesome is that? good job, singapore! you have managed to persuade many singaporean families to leave here for good every year, and quickly replace them with as many foreigners as you can. like nowadays, when i board the train, like 8 out of 10 carriages will have some bangla/ pinoy/ china/ angmoh around. like even when i walk around my neighbourhood, there will be china people talking in that super loud and crude voice ,like nobody cares about what you do with your life, my dear. and alot of them are working in the service industry with their atrocious english and attitude towards non-chinese speaking customers, maybe cos china is taking over the world, hip hip hurray! and the banglas will stare at you from top to toe like youre some piece of meat, i do feel violated and insecure, yes. like seriously, i think alot of singaporean girls will agree with me. and those dirty old angmohs who can mistake you for a SPG, i got that from a club before, yes. hell yeah, im proud to be local.

since im in a 'local local' mood, i changed the blog song to a local song. support local music yaw! lol. having a major cousins meetup later, before nirwan leaves for australia...lucky bitch;/

2010-01-12T19:54:00.004+08:00

( from her myspace: http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=151293327&albumID=2601395&imageID=37638196#a=2601395&i=37638203)
im having a major obsession with ke$ha,
and i can turn lesbian for her.
shit.

2010-01-05T10:43:00.008+08:00

the boyfriend has gone off to Muar for the next two days...what on earth is Muar, what does it even means, besides the fact that it is in Malaysia...sounds fishy to me:( i was just telling him how he was going to Muar and Muuaah2 wth some Muar kampong girl...dont worry mai, how can a kampong girl ever match up to you...MUAhahaha.

im currently bugged bout the fact that there are actually people who seems to be so obsessed about school, to even talk about schoolstuffs in facebook, go on and on talking about results and all and best of all, there is this one who was so anxious to direct you to where your exam venue is, thats crazy...yeah sure, school is where you make friends and yada yada yada...but it's boring right? maybe it's just me, i dont wanna start school dammit. thinking about gesl makes me wanna make a u turn and and speed my way home far far away from jalan bahar and im not kidding>:)

talking about facebook, i dont know but i feel that my privacy is in jeopardy cos of relatives telling my mum this and that. having your parents on facebook is not cool, its just a facade that is actually, simply an invasion of your privacy like, fuck, you already dont have privacy from them at home, and now, online too? and you have to be careful cos you can never really fucking trust anyone even if he/she is family. does that even make sense? who cares. guess i really need dr.ludwig's english classes asap.

maybe if this gets any worse, i will have to delete facebook altogther. and maybe keep this blog and update my super dead lookbook account, which im contemplating to cancel cos im so buh-loo-dee lazy and sometimes, you just wanna disappear from this earth for awhile, like be non existent for awhile. yeah, maybe one day.

more importantly, i finally found this song, aka my new blog song, after what seemed like a century, i dont know, its has this nice groove to it, is it ska? its not exactly dancey, but it makes me wanna sway from left to right...no idea what genre is it, but i absolutely heart this song and you should too!

2010-01-01T13:42:00.000+08:00

for 2010, i will

try to be a nicer person
be a better girlfriend, friend, sister, daughter.
reduce alcohol intake
study harder
bitch and gossip lesser
try my darnest not to offend anyone unknowingly( sorry, fauzy.)
reduce all unnecessary expenditure aka to stop clubbing/shopping dramatically

and by the end of this year, i shall reward myself

a crazy december shopping spree
one major party to end the year

tada~

2009-12-26T12:47:00.000+08:00

everyone is in the pursuit of happiness.

does it really matter whether if you're truly really happy,

cos there are many other things that are more important than your own happiness?

p.s dinner at ikea with some old friends sounds really good right now(:

2009-12-23T14:52:00.000+08:00

and so, i lost my boyfriend's ipod touch yesterday. i still think it was stolen as we squeezed through the crowd at town, seriously. nonetheless, it was just me being typically careless and irresponsible, and i want to take the fault for it. sighs. to think about it, i find it really hard for me to part with the money i earned so hard from the flea market. still, i feel so guilty towards boyfie and am very restless. im gonna get him a secondhand one later when i see him.

i feel jinxed, seriously. like sometimes, i will whine to myself, 'oh why do shit has to happen to me? why must i have shitty hair? fucked up skin condition where i think my skin resembles the craters on the moon? to be a malay with brown skin? etc etc....' and the list goes on and on. and i know i should stop it, there are many people out there with more serious misfortunes, dying everyday, killed everyday and struggling to survive everyday...sorry people.

i checked my exam results yesterday after much persuasion from my friends, turned out to be pretty okay. despite the fact that i was late for an hour for English (it was traffic jam, honest;) and got my logbook confiscated, which basically meant i went in empty-handed. and i can forget about rewarding myself with christmas shopping this year.sighs.

anway i checked out the new look store at 313 somerset yesterday and i saw this black sequined jacket and leather brown oxford shoes which totally look so super hot, which got me all excited that i could pee in my panties and i didnt wanna take them off when i put them on.and and the military jacket from zara, yes, im being a materialistic bitch. im just highly irritable right now.

2009-12-21T15:01:00.000+08:00

i no longer believe in best friends. but at least, im so thankful i have found true friends in nie. and yesterday i have come to realise that i can really count on my homies like dear faizul aka pie(in picture) and fauzul aka red bean pao. they really showed me what true friendship is(:

and not forgetting my very lovable boyfriend, who is still tolerating my nonsense till today together we go through shithole, one after another. i like the fact that i can bring him along to dine and hang out with my parents now. and surprisingly, they are totally cool with it. life just can't get any better till gesl , which will start later in school and i have to really keep my cool before i turn into bitch mode.

im only a first year degree student but i seriously cannot wait to graduate. i wanna put on my graduation gown and stuff all my friends into the car and drive them to marina barrage to take photos, using the blue skies as the backdrop, then we head to a fancy restaurant and have steamboat and a very heavy dinner. then after that, we will strip down into our clubbing gear and hit zouk and go home shagged and sleep in for the whole next day.cant wait@.@

2009-12-12T12:28:00.000+08:00

this week, i have been faced with so much bullshit from people of this particular prominent race of Singapore, up to the point i feel like converting into a racist. seriously, dont push it to there. they think everyone owes them a living, just because they are usually well-to-do and have the right ostracize and stereotype others, cos they are somewhat first class citizens here. just fucking stop it. as a teacher in the future, i wont nurture my children to become muthafuckin singaporeans like you. geez, im highly irritable right now, goodbye for now, you bunch of dumbfucks.

2009-12-10T12:42:00.000+08:00

im so angry that i feel like starving myself to overcome my anger with hunger. i feel wronged and unjustified. if you have already offended me, and i have kindly told you that i am offended by what you have just said, why are you still defending yourself? and now youre saying that i am taking what you said very personally? where is the logic in that? maybe you cant see the logic, and just simply say sorry, cos why, you dont have the logic of a nice person. you simply think about carrying out the task at hand, and that seems okay for you to trample on other people's feelings along the way.call me sensitive, but i have done my part, no wait, i even initated to start work and i deserve respect at least a bit,dont u think.

2009-12-07T18:34:00.000+08:00

shit, i can't take it...i want a military jacket and brown oxford shoes.

2009-12-02T10:49:00.000+08:00

school is closed till next year and ive been having a blast lately...right away after the english paper, we went for a major karaoke session where everybody went crazy and seriously nuts. i went to the hortpark and went on a 5km trail to mount faber with boyfriend. (it's amazing what he can make me do, seriously.) that boy always bring me to places i never knew, and i can never wear heels with him, cos we'll be somewhat hiking for most of our dates. and the nie clique went sentosa yesterday...haha. i got lost while driving to woodlands to fetch the homies, but i managed to find the way somehow, yay, so proud of myself. and i led the way from woodlands to siloso beach. woohoo! really had alot of fun and my body is still aching up till today...age is catching up on me, i swear. sometimes, i think about it, i am really lucky, like, im paid for studying for two years, i have a doting boyfriend, have a new bunch of friends that are hard to imagine as future biology teachers. haha! i know my birthday is in February but i already have my wish list up! i want a silver sequined jacket like the one kessha wore in the 'tick tock' mv,the great spy experiment ep album and loads of salmon sushi. that's not alot, right... okay, i should stop my nonsense. heheh. lala lalala~

taken by tyler, at the railway station.

2009-11-07T18:45:00.000+08:00

me and the fidazanto
(baby, help me edit this photo!)

this will be the most hectic november of my life. i have the exams, my cousin's wedding to help out and the many clubbing dates i promised here and there, which i hopefully can sucessfully lie my way through. and when it is all over, i shall pamper myself and especially, do something about my dead/ severely damaged hair that looks like a a haystack, waiting for a horse to randomly gallop by and eat my hair away. serious, its that bad.

i regret having english as my minor, seriously, it is not easy to teach english, i cant remember all my grammar rules and phonetics, homg, i think i wanna drop english, if it is even possible. i will suck as an english teacher.

nowadays, i have developed this weird habit of people-watching and admiring people for their beauty, especially indian people. i mean, they are usually the ones with flawless skin, big almond-shaped eyes, hair that stays in place (unlike mine),long and curly eyelashes and they dont have to use eyeliner or masacara to define their eyes. cos to me, good-looking people = big captivating eyes+ flawless skin+ shiny hair. then i will be overcome with envy and dont like the way i look and bitch about it to my boyfriend. haha, sometimes, i find it so amazing that my boyfriend can tolerate my nonsense. thank you, baby.only you would do that for me (:

nonetheless, school has been getting more fun. especially yesterday when i squeezed nine people into my poor car and we all went outta campus for brunch together. i felt the car was like, screaming in pain as i drove them around, while a partayy was going on at the back and we annoyed fellow ntu drivers. sorry! haha. must sooooo do this again.

i dont know, but i feel like im the sort of person who can talk about everything under the sun and at the same time,reveal so much about my life to a person, even if the person is not even close or its the first time im talking to that person. is it a bad thing? i worry, sometimes, cos i wonder if i give a bad impression to people and are they really listening when i keep yapping all the way? or will people think that im fake or trying too hard? i really worry about what people think about me alot, then i will space out , or better known as 'stoning'....or simply, maybe im thinking too much? i do get headaches when i think so much about all these then, i will think that maybe i should distance myself more so that i will stop regretting whatever i said or did to people..maybe that facebook quiz was right, i do have a personality disorder. okay, now i think i sound weird:S

okay, i should stop talking nonsense and go read up about the Archaea and the Slime Molds (im totally lost about them), then i shall eat steamed cockles, more specifically, Anadara granosa and bbq seafood for dinner later. yay! im really loving biology, especially when the class went to NUS Musuem and we saw an eagle, tiger, gigantic bats and turtles and and I carried a dead bat and a lemur in my bare hands. cool shit or whutttt...thank you NIE for accepting me after i got rejected by all the other universities. i will work hard to be a good biology teacher and make biology easy and interesting to my future students. hah! *smacks own ass and encourages herself*

2009-10-25T15:53:00.000+08:00

i shall start again by whining about how tired I am. Here, I am, sitting in the esplanade library, doing my work that seems never ending, while my gastric is killing me, and all the stress coming form project work. Its not that i hate working with people, its just stressful sometimes when i get forced to do things i dont wanna and let people tell me what to do like imma female dog, and inconsiderateness and inconvenience that comes along with it. i dont know, maybe im the one with the problem.

i had a great time with my college mates karaoke-ing and dining and movie-ing. We came to the conclusion that lady gaga looks like a tyranny in that pokerface music video, the fact that im shrinking and that i dont cry easily? haha, I dont know, i dont find the movie, "My Sister's Keeper" that tragic, i got abit teary for a while but i still didnt cry, unlike the rest of my friends. maybe because i just think that Kate is really lucky to have a loving family and one that is rich to do all that stem cell procedures and countless surgeries and all that shit. i mean, i bet there are families here in Singapore, who cant even afford to live a comfortable life, let alone support their sick children. that, to me, is tragic.

meanwhile, im supposed to be meeting my group mates at starbucks now, which i am taking my time to meet them, of course. they are not annoying to be exact, but just, inconvenient people?
heh. i shouldnt be so mean and i really spend a bomb this month, and zahra's tempting me with her M.A.C voucher. i feel like getting a sexy red lipstick, and a matte nude one for that nude look.
no i should stop it, and meet my group mates now. urgh.

school has been getting more fun, with all the outdoor biology trips around Singapore. but the shitty part is that all the workload is piling up and exams are next week! if i die along the way, please tell my momma that i love her, and xoxo to all the wonderful people that have entered my life, namely my beautiful boyfriend and my sexayy friends,as doom awaits me.

when on earth is all this shit gonna be over and i can finally partayy??? :(

2009-10-18T13:07:00.001+08:00

tomorrow im going to sungei buloh wetlands reserve for my biology practical. cool or whuuutt.hehe.
i think in gonna snatch my sister's white school shoes and get it all muddy and filfthy as i tread on the muddy mangroves and capture all the cute little animals lurking in the mud with my low quality cybershot camera cos i dropped it so many times. heheh. cant wait and plan to have a big dinner after that with all my biology teachers crew.

i went to an old friend's house for deepavali yesterday. the food was awesome, as usual. and priya looked so happy with her boyfriend, they look good together. heheh, i really envy those girls who can bring their boyfriends home and get to know your parents and everybody gets along and life would be easier, in a way. my parents and my boyfriend? uhm...i doubt my parents will understand and have the retarded notion that i can only have a boyfriend once i start working and i will be 23 by then.gawd, so old.sighs.

anyhow, there are things to look forward to.hehe. shopping on tuesday, slumber party at zahra's crib ?(i hope), a new haircut, more photography dates with boyfie and i feel like having a booth at home club flea market again, hmm...

meanwhile, i hope tyler gets better and im still curious what his momma thinks of me! grr...

2009-10-11T18:39:00.000+08:00

It's been a hard day's night

and I 've been working like a dog.

It's been a hard day's night,

I should be sleeping like a log.

homg.im so horribly busy, so many deadlines and assigments to complete by next two weeks. i didnt know it would be this hectic. i need a breakdotcom.i hate psychology lessons,seriously. yelp!

2009-10-02T12:00:00.000+08:00

and so this week i went over to my boyfriend's place so that he could show me to his mom. homg, i was so nervous that he had to drag me to his house while i struggle to get away. oh wells, i guess it wasn't that bad. his momma was nice and i feel bad cos i kinda dont understand many Malay words she said, so i hope i didnt misinterpret stuffs she said like, im supposed to be serious in certain parts of the conversation but i went ahead to laugh instead. and i just had to have a blonde moment and i actually forgot to thank her for everything when i was leaving. i hate being an airhead at times. oh wells, i hope the box of Ferraro Roche i gave to his momma will please her, hehe. i even decorated it with a maroon ribbon to make it look extra special(:

i really have to thank my baby for helping me out with my super tedious english holiday assignment. if he didnt pushed me last night, i would still be procrastinating and wont get it done before the damn deadline. i miss my college mates, when the fuck will we hang out sia. haha.and i have so many school stuffs/ shit to do, dont like the gpa system, seriously. and i want more holidays!

2009-09-20T02:35:00.000+08:00

absolument vintage.

actually im more interested in the convertible. hee. but where am i going to find S$ 127, 000??! maybe im thinking too far, i should get my degree first, then think about getting a car. yawns.

i realise now how small singapore really is. i dont know about the chinese community but, i know the malay community is so small, i really think that everybody knows each other somehow. its great cos then everybody can get along. or is it only in nie? heh. this week i brought my mum and my sis to ntu for dinner, we had Canadian pizza, which is really value for money so while we're enjoying the food, my sister is eyeing the Caucasian students walking by. come to think about it, i dont have any eye candy in school at all. lol.

today is the last day of the fasting month, im yet to find a kebaya batik skirt that fits me so maybe i'll try to head to geylang around midnight to freaking find one and eat all the burger ramly and wadeh before the bazaar ends by tomorrow. but im meeting the boy first to check out some pastries at central and fleaflyflofun before going geylang. today's a really busy day. i miss my turtle-lookalike boyfriend. hehee. we're planning to join a photography competition together, just for the fun of it. so yeah, im very content in life now but im just abit worried for my studies. oh wells, just like this song says, "nothing's gonna change my world". selamat hari raye to all muslims all over the world and all the joy/food that comes along with it cos we deserve it,period.

2009-09-12T21:15:00.000+08:00

im super pleased that the fasting month is going to be over pretty soon.cos i think i have been facing alot of stress lately, especially with english language(whoever thought it would be this hard), road rage (everyday i worry about changing lanes as quickly as possible to get to the pie (changi) side), not getting enough sleep and not spending enough time with the ones that matter the most. as soon as i reach home, i jsut wanna sleep and sleep and more sleep. but apparently, its hard to do so since i have a really bloody annoying sister who made me fetch her and search for her around town in the wee hours of morning like, 3 to 4am. she thinks that just because i got my license , im her official chauffeur. I could have murdered that girl, i swear. and the lack of sleep and food/water has made me very grumpy, whiny, easily agitated and just fuck tired. i feel so tired 24/7 and i feel bad that i dont show enough attention and give more time to the ones i care for the most. sighs.

2009-09-06T03:00:00.000+08:00

finally have the time to blog. uni life is getting more and more fun, hehe. i used to reject the idea of not having a proper class in school, but thinking about it, not having a fixed class is more fun as you can just talk to random people, and at the end of the day you forget everybody's names again. dorts.yesterday i brought a friend over to my crib and she forced me to open up this religious book and made me memorise some arabic alphabets but i only managed to remember four. yay! and she practically gave up on me and slept on my bed. LOL. and we went to ntu iftar this week ( i finally found out what an iftar is ) and i was intimidated at first cos i have not prayed for a decade already and i thought i have to wear the tudung. turns out, we dont really have to and we just ate and met so many nice ntu girls there and the food is fab! yay, FREE FOOD always tastes better:DDDDDDDDDDD

but school is so tiring cos its so far and i just feel like dozing off while driving along the highway home, so i always blast the music and sing my heart out to all the songs on the radio, and i will get over-excited and start exceeding the speed limit; highwayyyyyy to helll.

because of the shitty timetable, im extremely exhausted after school and i will channel this negative energy on boyfriend and i will feel bad cos i get tired easily while he wanna travel here and there. sorry baby, i lack stamina or maybe its just because im fasting. im fucking hungry and having gastric all the time; fucungry. and when i see people eat, like, taking one bite at a time, the acidity in my stomach doubles each time they chew their mouth and its killing me dawg:(

soon, this will all be over and i can eat all the lontong and rendang and pineapple tarts and lamond cookies all i want. okay, acid in stomach killing me again dot com.

2009-08-25T18:40:00.000+08:00

finally i have the time to blog.school has been so tiring and it doesnt help that the weekends seem to pass by so fast and travelling to and fro tires me out.school seems to be getting better, especially since im meeting more people with the "same frequency", cos i still think there are too many studious people around. and its sucky cos we dont have orientation so i will try to make my own orientation before each lecture/tutorial so i can know more people. ahaha.no worries, im hoping things will change for the better soon.and and i have more friends wearing the tudung now, like,wow.i always been scared they will not like my openess and me taking my religion too lightly.yay!

now,im actually more worried about what to wear tomorrow. sighs. how do poly people do it. seriously?? haha!

im hungry!!!this fasting month is killing me dot com. i think of sushi all the time and i have to fight the urge to hug my boyfriend whenever he books out and i will give him this constipated look.sighs. miss that turtle lookalike boyfriend and his ns is bloodily annoying. okay, seriously hungry right now that i could feel the insides of my tummy getting corroded by the gastric juice.so long and goodnight.

2009-08-12T14:31:00.000+08:00

i only have one word to say about school, fuckoring(better known as fucking boring).all i think about is when can i end school and get to my car and blast the music and drive myself home and knock out and sleep.to think about it, im kinda glad i missed the hostel application date cos nothing beats having the car to myself everyday.hee:D

for the past two days at school,i have been trying to be late for everything cos its so dry and boring,seriously. but the tutors/lecturers always turn up later than me instead.awesome.and im still looking for a fellow slacker cos everybody is so studious siaaaaaaaaaaaa.almost everybody had their notes printed out even on the first day and scribbling whatever the teachers are saying.homg,take a chill pill seriously.see,boring right??

im currently hooked to madonna's celebration. when im in my forties, i wanna be hot like her.hee.

2009-08-06T14:04:00.000+08:00

this week, i guess i have to be proud of myself that i managed to run 2.6km even after, six months of not exercising at all. hehe, and boyfie thought i could run a marathon, yeah right.

last night, we witnessed a fire broke out from a flat on the top floor.within minutes the whole master bedroom was in two metre-high flames and thick black smoke everywhere, which i could smell from the ground floor.and the firefighters came in a jiffy and then the unexpected happened. Little kids and even older residents can be heard from all over the block, shouting and jeering at the firefighters,like, "oi, fireman, faster larh." like what the fuck, they are fucking risking their lives to put out the fire. It just reflects on how these _____children are being brought up,seriously. no wait, it just shows how ugly the average singaporean is.if youre one of these people, you ought to be ashamed.

on a lighter note, i have this freshman welcome ceremony thingy tomorrow morning which im kinda reluctant to go cos it will be with the nanyang business school students,which im not exactly psyched up about seeing cos i will just feel like an outcast and dont belong to ntu cos im not smart enough.and im not thrilled to meet other fellow student teachers cos i think i will frighten everyone away with my acne and ugliness till no one wanna make friends with me so maybe i'll just lie to my momma that im going for it, while i meet boyfie at woodlands and we shall go for a run or something, i hope.at least my boyfriend thinks im pretty, hehe.

2009-08-03T13:52:00.000+08:00

this morning i woke up and checked my facebook and guess what, dylan eiland added me as a friend!! hahah! he is so cute i can hyperventilate and just die, right here, right now.

ive been having insomnia for two weeks already, i can only manage to sleep about four hours everyday. and my eye bags are getting so heavy i can stuff apples in em and i feel so tired and am always yawning almost all the time and school is starting next week,and im worried. boyfie says i should try exercise. homg, me and exercise is like,urm, almost impossible.and we planned to go for a run and swim tomorrow. I guess i have to be a good girlfriend and motivate him to ace his ippt. homg,RUN? sounds so painful to me.i have to prepare myself mentally, dammit. i hate running,like major big time.i can never be like those sporty girls who get excited everytime it's time go for a run,no way.

2009-07-29T14:29:00.000+08:00

and so last weekend was spent with my baby at changi beach and we took some amazing photos there and ate so much at changi village.im trying to upload em here but there seems to be some problem with bloody blogger,so its all up on facebook.seriously,if it wasnt for him,i wouldnt know that such a beautiful place like this do exist in singapore.one day very soon,im going to get the car and we're gonna go explore all the untouched and rural parts of this boring city.

i cant seem to make up my mind what to major in,it boils down to either chemistry or biology.i like chemistry but i suck at it.i know i will have a hard time with biology,like,what is homologous chromosomes,again??this time, there will be no patient tutors to sit down with me to explain everything over and over again,and no past year papers to help.the shitty thing is,i have to make up my mind by tomorrow.and i wonder if i should get a hostel with my cousin,i hope there is no curfew or whatsoever,but the thing is,im so spoilt and i have never done any housework in my entire life before but then again,this is my chance at 200% freedom.fickle fickle.

im not psyched at all about school starting.i kinda dont wanna be a student again cos i know i will be surrounded by all the smart arses and im going to struggle for another four years.oh wells,i wish i was born with higher IQ.more importantly,what should i wear on my first day eh??so weird,going school without a uniform.heh.

am going to meet boyfie for awhile and collect my altered jeans later on.maybe go punggol end on friday and snap some awesome peektures. pick nikki and keefy up and bring em out for a ride.i still cant figure out what to do.and maybe some good ol' shisha on sunday with katy and her fiance.by next monday i should be exhausted,and hopefully i can club by wednesday or thursday ladies night before school starts proper but its becoming increasingly hard for me to club now cos momma suspects that im drinking ever since i came home drunk that night. shit.we'll see how it goes.i miss drinking gin and vodka.maybe i shouldnt drive,i dont wanna end up drink-driving. fickle fickle again.

2009-07-19T14:04:00.000+08:00

been there, done that, messed around.
im having fun, dont put me down.
i'll never let you sweep me off my feet.

Yay. to the fact that i finally have a driving license. i can go crusing and pimpin' all over the world~~~and i have three pairs of black boots now. i met up with keefe the bitch last night. i can see my boyfriend more often now and we struck liquid gold ( durian ice kacang) together and im going to get paid for studying and buy and eat all the sushi , kerang and tom yum all i want.

Boo. to the fact that i still cant park the car for nuts and im terrified of the highway. i couldnt get to meet nikki. i cant drink and drive at all. i have this sudden desire to be a lawyer but i cant, not now. boyfie had chivas without me. have not had enough of sheesha.and missed LCV. there was a lecastlevania lookalike at haji lane last night! and my eyebrows are joining in the middle, again. retarded.

2009-07-07T09:35:00.000+08:00

today i woke up so early cos i had a retarded nightmare of red worms gathering together to form the shape of a butterfly and it started to fly towards me, from my bathtub to my bed. i woke up panting, sighs and i cant get back to sleep anymore. now im too scared to enter the bathroom, so maybe i should not bathe today. hahaha. okay, stop it.

last night was just bad news from baby, and i feel so sorry for him, and the worst part, i cant do anything about it. sighs, nothing can change the fact that ns sucks. hopefully, things will work out.

okay currently, im turned off by a few people, both in the virtual world and in the real world. i dont know but i think there are so many people in self- delusion. they self proclaim this and that and embarass themselves, but they dont know how to stop, or worse, dont even see whats wrong. its sad, isnt it? and i dont know why but im just really turned off by _____ girls who wear really thick black eyeliner till they look like pandas but they just go around thinking that theyre hot. annoying. weird. okay fine, maybe im being bitchy, but its kinda annoying when these girls look at you in that snobbish way just cos they think they are hot but personally, i think they are nothing without all that eyeliner/ make up:P and then i will roll my eyes till my contacts get lost in my eye sockets and be temporarily blind for a minute. cool eh? dorts.

okay more importantly, i have to check out the night safari website by today to get the weekend price, i wanna get someone to go with me to see le castle vania baby!!!!!! anyone??? wtfff, this is not a deejay set, he is really coming like fuck, really here, we're gonna be breathing in the same air and space at homeclub, sighs, im hyperventilating. and everytime i check my mail, there will be updates from home club and i just get more and more excited, presale tickets are out, babayyy! i wanna go, somebody please go with meeeee. hehee.

oh yes, today i must, i must figure out the way to transfer photos and vids into my phone today. homg, i sound so dumb, ahaha. but i just dont know how to work with this new phone, cooperate, bitch! lol. im just a technology idiot lurh, a tech-diot. tekdeeyherd.

2009-06-26T13:57:00.000+08:00

alas, i lost my bar virginity at o bar...dorts. it was me and the usual crew..love my sexy ladies:D
i must admit i had alot of fun, too much fun, perhaps...till i broken my vow never to get drunk. ive just finally recovered from the hangover, homg, its so horrid.i think i wont drink for a very long time to come.heh.

this week i gotten a new phone, but i have absolute no idea how to acess the web with it...urgh, imma tech idiot forever. and i thought GPS and GPRS were the same thing...

more importantly, boyfriend has guard duty tomorrow so i gotta wait for one more day, and i can finally see him...hmm...having a ns boyfrioend has somewhat made me very patient, maybe?heh.
but it has ceratinly made me sound so mushy...homg, sorray, i cant help it, this crazy little thing called love:)

and so i say, " Are you ready for six months and beyond?"
and he said, " to infinity and beyond! "
:D

2009-06-17T15:46:00.000+08:00

and so last week was spent in the bungalow...which means 24/7 air-con, eating and bbq! , lazing around and most importantly, cable telly!!! hehe.i took this shot while me and the cousins were waiting for the sunset by the beach, gonna ask my photographer boyfriend what he thinks of this. heh.

i invited my high school friends over, but nobody could make it , well, its okay, i'll take the blame of not planning earlier, and then mom blaming me for all the food going to waste...i guess im not gonna be the official planner of such meetups like this anymore. okay, lets not talk about it... my college mates came over, we called macdonalds delivery and irritated the receiver, lol, and had a blast watching beverly hills chihuahua...i rate the show ten outta ten! hehehe. boyfie came and slept over too, sighs, how i wish my parents would undertsand and we can be more comfortable around my family. oh wells, we went cycling in the morning and i made breakfast for him and bid him goodbye as he left to book in.

yesterday i went to the one of the infamous polyclinics, what the heck, i'll just type it here, HOUGANG SINGHEALTH POLYCLINIC. i had to wait three freaking hours just to see the doctor. i had to wait one hour just to register, another two hours for the doctor to get back from lunch, HOW FUCKING ABSURD.i know i wasnt a serious case, but how about the many singaporens who have to wait so long in the public clinic like this, because they cant afford healthcare at private clinics?? i couldnt take it, i just had to write a feedback form and complain. i felt like spitting on the president and his wife's photos on the wall. the government goes about saying they wanna make singapore into a premier medical hub of asia and the world, but they cant even take care of their own singaporeans, cos why? becos the goverment is always putting the foreigners first before their own people...and why? for their money.politics in singapore is just plain retarded, like, nobody knows who the president is, he just popped out of nowhere? and we're giving him so much money, respect and power and now you tell me, what for?

i went for my annual heart checkup at the national heart centre. i didnt know how serious it was until the doctor told me about all the precautions i must take everyday. all along, i kept thinking that im just perfectly normal, healthwise, but i admit, i push myself very hard, in those school physical activities back then. i would treat random sudden heartaches as just me being very tired. i was emotional after the checkup, sobbed abit, im always like that after every checkup but i always managed to hide it from momma. heh. and i called boyfriend after his training, and he just made me remember all the good things that i already have... like, him, my family, my topshop shades, my two tubs of corn ice cream and vanilla coke in the fridge, my oxford heels, my flats, my leaking air-con, my computer with awesome sound system, etc etc...

on a lighter note, its partayy time with rathi for some good ol' ladies night clubbing. hope everything goes as planned. wanna dance my ass off.

2009-06-11T18:16:00.000+08:00

today im officially appointed a general education officer. am i happy? hell to the gyeah. \m/

Stacks on deck
Patrone on ice
And we can pop bottles all night
Baby you can have whatever you like
I said you can have whatever you like
Yeah

2009-06-04T16:07:00.000+08:00

its already the fourth of june. and i still dont know where im going for the rest of my life. sighs. oh wells, i have more important things on my mind. ahaha. today i called home club and the girl on the other end was so super friendly, we talked like girlfriends, she made me more excited bout lecastlevania coming. it reminds me of the other time i called up attica and the other girl on the line was super fun and nice as we got all excited talking about white boys. dorts. hmm...maybe when all fails, i shall work in a club or bar or something, or take up bartender-ing or deejay-ing and be a resident deejay at attica or something. cool or what. meanwhile, my parents stressed me up for writing appeals to the universities, that i felt like a desperate bitch. and the weather here is fucked up cos there is absolutely no wind at all even in the night, and it makes me feel so nauseous and im kinda fuming over the fact that boyfie had to have his phone confiscated.

i hate singapore, food here is getting more and more expensive, public transport fares are expensive, the goverment here is like a senior citizens club ( i wonder why till today, they havent gone senile and worse of all, not dead yet!) and keep making decisions in the aim of just making more and more money, prioritising the rich and the smart and the "foreign talents" over anybody else ( p.s i think they invest all the money we have to fucking pay them, in some genetic research or what shit to make themselves live longer or something). in short, living in singapore has become more costly, and i dont mean to diss people but there are many inconsiderate and ungracious singaporeans here, like, its hard to find a gentleman here and seriously i find this country is dead boring. like everybody's lives revolve around work, money and education. like, everyone is competing all the time, competing in national exams, even competing to reach the library first to study your ass off or rushing to meet tutors after school to ask as much questions as you can(thats so junior college, i tell you).in short, singapore is dead boring, small,competitive and nerdy.eww.i still dont understand why there are people who are so keen on visiting singapore and people who are pro-PAP.its okay, i dont need and dont want to hear comments from people like these.

2009-06-02T12:42:00.000+08:00

taken by tyler, my baby, long long ago. im finding all the old peektures we used to take on our simple and memorable dates where he will take me to places ive never been before and where he will try teach me to use the dslr but i will be clueless to whatever he's saying cos im too lazy to read the manual till today and also due to my short attention span. dorts. sighs, miss that ns boy.

on the other hand, ny sissy's birthday is coming up this week, i bet she's all psyched up and trying not to show it and im still too broke for anything. but ive alrdy bought her dorothyperkins shoes and warehouse bikini for her birthday, and the irony is ,till this year, ive gotten nothing from her. sighs. but whats more important now is that i

pass my driving test ny next tuesday
save up to see LCV live baby at home club
save up enough by end of june to club at double o for the first time
get a decent blusher
book the surprise spa treatment for momma's birthday
get that red checkered topman wallet for dad's birthday
save up by this year for singfest or zoukout

speaking of singfest, im really glad i went for the 2007 one, the lineup was awesome. i mean, a7x and gym class heroes and cobra starship came down!!! 2008's singfest was crappy to me, like, what the hell is stacie orrico is doing here??!! if i had the power to choose who to come down, it would be

lykke li
mystery jets(again!)
lady gaga
lily allen
katy perry
jimmy eat world
and kaskade to play awesome remixes while each band take their time to set up

cool or what:D

oh oh, today ive found the true meaning of yelle's je veux tu voir. such a cheeky song. hehe.
je veux tu voir dans uh film pornographique, i wanna see you in a pornographic film. LOL. and jefree star's songs are so horny, especially, we want cunt... he looks scary to me sometimes@.@

2009-05-23T12:37:00.000+08:00

me and sarah fierce

the previous week has really been one of the most awesome week of my life. sexayy azzy hailed down from the land down under after almost a decade, he is so full of love, craziness, bitchiness and of course, fierce-ness. he brought all of us on shopping sprees, complimentary dining and best of all, my first ever M.A.C makeover. wow, back then i wont even dare to step into M.A.C, now i have so many M.A.C products, im still clueless what the mineralizing powder is for? LOL.
he is like santa claus, only fiercer version. i was elated and amazed at how he maintains his double life and his amazing friends and of course us, the family, who accepts and loves him for who he is. i wished i had enough money to visit him in sydney and repay him for so much kindness and love he showered on us. miss that diva and now reality steps in and life is once again so boring and dull and stressful.

yesterday was a bad day, i

lent an ex colleague whom im not close to at all, some cash, i really hoped she would repay me back asap cos im short of cash myself
stressed out about the university thing especially when people keep asking me about it
seriously i dont understand why i bother to care for you when i know i mean nothing at all to you, but thanks for the memories that we shared for so long which you apparently have chosen to toss aside for the rest of your life
think i shouldnt care so much for my sister. ive never met anyone so ungrateful before in my life, and to think people like her have FANS??!?! i think this younger generation is abit warped kay, like probably they never heard of the word, "personality". they think as long as youre pretty, youre popular? urm say whutttt....
vented alot of my anger on my boyfriend. NS is killing our relationship, i swear. i tried telling him that my patience was wearing thin and im really sick and tired of his NS crap. i hope i can be more patient.its so hard.
think some people can be so full of themselves, i say, full is shit and alot of air. in malay terms, "world" kinda people. annoying.
thought of deleting this blog soon and keep a private journal, maybe.

2009-05-19T13:20:00.000+08:00

i had an awesome time last saturday with my amazing friends, my lovely boyfriend and his best friend. we made such a din at ambrosia and we were not even high yet. dorts. we had bad wine but awesome company like jerome, kaixiang, keefe, the beautiful nikki, my lovely boyfriend and his bestie nuzli. im glad we all got along well and i planned a surprise for all the NS boys and bought a big chocolate cake with the words, "NS SUCKS" wriiten on it like the one shown below.

cool or what. ahaha. we were fussing over the drinks, i really was craving for vodka or chivas la the other day, but due to financial constraints we had bad wine chosen by kaixiang. LOL. then we kept laughing at the guys' silly ns bunkmates and their retarded antics. thats when i realised my kinda missed my college days when everybody else would be stressed out doing their tutorials while we will be like, laughing and talking about sex, sex and more sex. i had so much fun and i missed laughing like crazy when we cried out " BDSM" in unison. miss you all so much lurh. i think i kinda splurged alot and when the bill came to about 160 bucks. wth. oh wells, it was all worth it as long as i had fun. i wanna drink with these happy shiny people again and again and since im listening to kaskade now, i feel like clubbing and party again and again and again and again and again until i K.O, but im already heavily broke and suffering from financial embarrassment. urgh. okay, currently my main goal is to save up for drinks, shisha , club, sissy's birthday, my friends' birthdays, my momma's and pappi's birthday. pappi pappi pappi chulo~

2009-05-11T13:58:00.000+08:00

i cant help but feel scared, ive been checking all my application status online EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY.okay, actually im in frantic mode, the last day for the acceptance of offer is 1 june, now its already 11 may. 31-11=20 more days for a miracle to happen. no wonder i just cant sleep these past months. i check my phone every single minute, lie down by my house phone the whole day everyday, check my mail everyday, emo-ing the whole day as i keep having negative thoughts thinking, now not only am i ugly, im stupid too, great. awesome, im going crazy. why dont they wanna call me, i didnt do that bad what, right? did i? i have some people telling me not to worry, but till today, i havent got even one call. im desperate, any fucking course will do. i will do anything, anything man. i always hoped that i wont be in this kinda situation, now that i am, everything seems bleak, and you see your friends happy/content with their future in control, or you see your friends fussing over which course to choose, and here i am, going quite mad, cos i only have myself to blame. it sucks badly to be in this state and they will never understand whats its like to have absolutely no control over where your future is heading to, and whats its like to let your parents down, what is it like to try and try so hard, how its like to hide your fear and tears from your parents everyday, how it is like to lie to your parents and assure them that everything will work out and how its like to feel useless and stupid and unwanted and rejected and its only me me me myself to blame. it sucks. dont you ever talk to me about uni unless you want me to go berserk.

2009-05-08T23:02:00.000+08:00

me and priyaaa baby. there was so much to talk about and she got attached without telling me, urgh. alas, poor girl had to leave in a jiffy cos she forgotten all about her assignment. dorts. wow, we both have really BIGGG EYES. hehe. and i still havent gotten my mum anything for momma's day on sunday.tomorrow's my only chance. meanwhile, neeting boyfie tmr, its the only day i can see him cos he has to book in by sunday for retard guard duty.bleargh.

2009-05-05T20:17:00.000+08:00

im dying to get this but i have no moneyzszszszszsz.i want money but i dont wanna get a job and im meeting lovely priyaaa tomorrow.

2009-05-02T23:53:00.000+08:00

so in the end, i turned down topman job offer last minute ( cool or what) ,the boutique manager was kind enough to assure me that i will not get blacklisted, its okay, i dont wanna work for 6 days a week and i wanna see baby on weekends and and i dont really need topshop staff discounts and and i dont wanna make-up to work everyday and and i dont regret my decision(: heh.

and so, Glen died, lets observe a minute of silence for my british boyfriend.dorts . i miss clubbing and i had nice impromptu dates with boyfie, he is one thing i know i did something right in my life. hee. meanwhile, im in need of money, retail therapy and good old girly girly fun and and lily allen's "not fair" is stuck in my head. i wanna save money and go straighten and maintain my bangs like that.

2009-04-30T15:01:00.000+08:00

and so today, i woke up super early for an interviewand before i know it, i was hired on the spot for Topman, whuuut? topMAN? i tried to ask for Ben Sherman, but they only wanna hire dicks, urgh, sexists. i thought getting ben sherman will allow me to claim staff discounts and buy for baby stuffs there cos i know baby likes bernsherman, oh wells, topman is okay, i guess. but i cant find myself getting estatic over it, cos working part time means i have to give up my weekends, the only days when i can only meet my ns boyfie, urgh, he wont be too pleased about this either. sighszszszszsz.

then off i went to hmv to kill time while waiting for miraaa baby to end her interview, my sexayy girlfriend called me out of the blue to tell me that she was spotted for Singtel Grid Girls auditions at a club, talk about coolness. i was so super duper happy for her that i screamed and shrieked in the hmv store, hehe, i really wished i can help her in the make-up part, but im no expert, i think every girl should do her own make-up and practise and learn herself? then i wanna thank miraaa baby very very muchhhh, with lotsa love/kisses/cuddles/squeezes/hugs/etc etc... for giving me a Salvatore Ferragamo wallet!!! tomorrow i'll start work, and tomorrow marks the end of my im-so-free-i-just-wanna-rot-and-die-at-home days, and i just hope boyfie understands:/

2009-04-27T11:37:00.000+08:00

wani, nad, mee and miraaa. ouii ouii.

business wasnt so good, oh wells, it got my spirits down for abit, but i earned the most, so i cant complain. heh. ive learned that fleas are tiring, boring, hot and hard to earn money. but i was trying hard to be friendly, saying hi and smiling to anyone who passes by, till my cheeks hurt,oh wells, a lil bit of sprite vodka helped cool me down abit(thanks wani), and also the awesome company cos we kept talking about boobs till night falls and loadsa drama with the money issues.lol.

im so super boredd at home that im watching all the old rnb/hiphop/reggae music videos and dancing till the point of exhaustion and dehydration and hunger. i think i wanna cook and eat lotsa instant noodles to pass the time, and some glen to induce myself to sleep cos i cant these days. am so restless, i miss clubbing and my baby. I sent him to cda last night, it was my first time accompanying him to book in, i was almost the only girl in the bus. haha, and baby look cute in the cd uniform, urm, kinda sexy, haha, shall not elaborate here. well, what can i say, guys in uniforms are a turn-on for me, especially since i have something for CD guys. hehehe.lalala~

2009-04-23T11:00:00.000+08:00

hey YOU
hey YOU
hey YOU

help me clear my wardrobe as i will be selling off many of my pre-loved and brand new items at the upcoming flea market on 25th april, this saturday at HOME CLUB babayyy. i think my booth is numbered #40, and i will be sharing the booth with three other gorgeous ladies, so im sure you wont be disappointed visitng our booth, haha and i promise it will be dirt cheap buying from meee, i can vouch for that.

shoes from only 5 bucks.
dresses/ tops( both pre-loved and brand new, from heritage, supre,forever 21, etc..) going from 8 bucks
vintage shades which you can never find anywhere else;P , 1 for 5 bucks, 2 for 8 bucks;D
the best part, ALL PRICES ARE NEGOTIABLE BABYYY.

2009-04-19T11:04:00.000+08:00

i like this shot taken by him(:

us!

yesterday was a beach day out with my boyfriend, whom i can only meet for once a week due to his bloody ns, so i always try to make the most of every chance we get to meet, sighs. ns is so annoying, i swear.@%$@#$@#$? rebel! hahaha. we went to get Glen and headed to sentosa baybeh...i had only like, 3 cups then i got high already for the first time, im sucha weakling lurh. i like the feeling Glen gave me, hehehe, i started tearing, laughing out loud cos everything seemed funny and baby had to quieten me down and hold me or else i just wanna sleep and never wake up. unglam but i like! lol but i know i dont have to worry cos baby is there to take care of me in case i get high. hehee. and i almost clubbed again, but the queue was too long at powerhouse,
and i didnt wanna pay cover charge, so i shall still keep to my promise that i wont be clubbing for a looooong time now.

meet the new boyfriend, Glen, my british romance. yays, now at least of just emo-ing/waiting like a war bride for boyfriend to book out from ns/ waiting like a female doggg for university to accept me/ rotting at home alone, now i have Glen to keep me company.awesome!!! thank you baby! im gonna miss you again for another 6+++days like fuckkk. come home soon and lets go eat sup tulang, zamzam murtabhak, many many sushi, chili tuna sandwiches etc etc... + Glen

2009-04-16T14:42:00.000+08:00

met up an old friend, my dear nurul syuhaidah, meow meow friend, soo cute la she. i felt like cuddling up to her and kissing her cheeks, but i had to control myself, hehehe. we reminisced about our MI days and bitched about jc life, and stressed about our future together gether. like,
seriously, some people are just so so fortunate and here we are, so desperate for a place in the university, that we will accept any bloody course.i will do anything, anything, just to get into one.

yesterday met up with the cuzzies,looking for jobs...sucha doggy day la, we acting like dogs and barking, whining and howling, at everything and everyone around us, we made such a din but we just didnt care, and laughed till we were thirsty and am sorry for being sucha nuisance.hehe.

2009-04-09T15:29:00.000+08:00

oh all those local unis who dont wanna accept me, you know what, fuck you. seriously i dont think i did that bad, okay i did badly but not so bad, so yeah fuck you and fuck me for screwing up my future. fuck you fuck you very very much. and thanks so much for making me wait and wait like a female dogg whether i can be offered a place in your bloody university, making me have the false hope and driving my life into aimless-ness and emo-ness, till i feel so depressed i wished i could die so you know what, i dont wanna care anymore:P

priceless.
wah best sia.

last night was clubbing with the cuzzies and mira's amazing friends. look at me grinning madly. ahaha.i wanna thank em for bringing me out and dancing my ass off, instead of emo-ing alone at home. but this may be the last time ill go to powerhouse, damn pissed with the service. i almost picked a fight with this CHINA staff, so rude until i threatened to call her manager. i wished she accidentally fell down and died from the stampede and her skull broke open and she will bleed profusely but everybody thought she just got wasted and her blood is just gin coke(my favourite, btw) or something.oh wells, nonetheless, i had an awesome time and we owned the night, mira!

me and rool.

i dont get it, why he's still not attached. lol.
so ladies, grab your chance now! ahaha.

i miss my baby, hurhur...warning: im in a mushy mood now.LOL! i cant wait for him to come back, hes the only guy out there who treats me the nicest, takes care of me well, protects me, always prioritise me first, who will never raise his voice at me and best of all, loves me so much. awww. okay, enough.im feeling shy.hehehe.lololol.till then, were pimpin all over the world.

2009-04-06T14:49:00.000+08:00

after watching final destination 3 last night,i keep thinking of death and i wake up today feeling so ugly on the outside and the inside that i wanna bury myself deep underground for a gazillion years till the end of the world. im simply not good enough for my parents, those stupid local universities, my sister, my friends and my baby. (the whole world, dammit) and im suffocating in this house, pleading to god (if he does really exists) to take my life away right now, and prolly the world will be a better place cos i just wanna give up now.

2009-04-02T18:28:00.000+08:00

I shall say this is my craziest clubbing outing. But i shall not reveal too much, i just wanna dont want people to get the wrong perception of her. but seriously, i wouldnt mind putting up my room for rent if she really has no place to go. wow, imagine having a good friend as your roomate. awesome.

finally clubbed with my beautiful massimo dutti ex-colleagues.
me and cindy missed each other so much uh. its so amazing i can club and get along so well with these women despite our big age differences. hehehe. and thank cindy so much for the champagne and her company. so crazy dancing at the pole, disturbing guys, fake catfights( our ah lian gang. haha!) and smacking each others' butts whevever the deejay play flo~rida.lol.

from left: geny, me!, cindy and peimaaan. XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO.

and of course, i met up with the beautiful kit mey after like, two years.
as we talked, i realised shes so much open minded like me uh. we chatted about everything, our lives, boys and shared all our secrets. i simply luurve people like her, teeheehee.
i bet we will be like besties if we entered the same jc.

and we entered attica, (awesome place. i tell you), we got free lollipops and TWENTY COMPLIMENTARY DRINKS. i accidentally took five more by accident. ahahaha. and unfortunately, thats when the trouble began...but its okay, we managed. i guess its really important to have friends whom you can trust and really care about you.

kitty and mia(my clubbing name, wth.lol!)

i think rathi baby is my ultimate clubbing partner uh, and her boyfriend trusts me! lol.
we almost died that night, die from exhaustion. haha! but then again, what are friends for right(:

mrs sakthi and mia

2009-03-30T09:35:00.000+08:00

somehow its bothers me that she is annoyed at the silliest things that no one will ever take notice of or really rant about it as though its really a big deal, and still dont realise how ever lucky she is, and i would do anything to be in her shoes, ceteris paribus.

meanwhile, portishead is currently the music of my life and im still trying to dodge the very fact that a local u may never accept me, and im here, numb to all the reality around me, and speaking of reality, i kinda like this excerpt i got from a book i read last night( gasp! mai actually reads? lol.). The book is titled 'my idea of fun' by will self. here goes:

'reality is a virgin whose virtue we all want to believe in, and, at one and the same time, an old whore who we've all had and had again, until our eyes and ears are like genitals that have been rubbed raw.'

cute, huh? hehe. even though in reality, im really broke right now( last time i checked i have only 5 bucks in my wallet), i still wanna go club. even though in reality, i have not so fantastic grades, i still really wanna do law in uni. and the list goes on and on...On a brighter note, hopefully i will hit the clubs this wed and meet up with my beloved kit mey whom ive not met for so long, and also sexy rathi who always cracks me up with her sarcasm. And not forgeting, my super nice former colleagues, especially cindy,who bought us two bottles of vodka for my belated birthday, awesome. seriously cant wait to let Reality go again, and catch up and the amazing ladies. And i cant wait for miraaa to get back, settle the flea issue, and maybe invite a girlfriend to join us.hee.

2009-03-27T12:37:00.000+08:00

Not A Love Song - UH HUH HER

i have never felt so cross until last night because of her
display of immaturity and total no consideration for others, again and again.
why do i deserve this? maybe it's high time i shouldnt be too nice
and soft hearted, so i wouldnt be taken advantage of too much.
but thank you mira and rool for being there,
lets rock this april, without her, of course.

today i killed a cockroach all by myself.
i found it chilling in the living room by itself.
lets name it mr cockroach.

i told mr cockroach that i wont provoke you if you dont do the same to me.
to my horror, it crawled to my modem , near my left foot.
i was like, holy shit, you asked for it mister.
then i grabbed a ridsect and sprayed at it.
then it actually "hopped" off to my bedroom door,
and i was so stunned that i dropped the ridsect to the floor.
i didnt dare pick up the ridsect cos it was too close to mr cockroach.
then i ran off to grab a baygon and sparyed at it continously for ten minutes
and mister cockroach is now history.

now lets get back on with our lives;)
im so proud of myself today:B

p.s dont you think the younger generation is uhh, just so annoying.
uh huh hur.

2009-03-23T11:44:00.000+08:00

(from left:) shah, me a.k.a mahalakhsmi,
mira a.k.a aishwarya rai and rool.

oh, spank us if we misbehave.lmao.

it was an impromptu meetup. ate at popeye, sat down at the flyer
for awhile, while shah painstakingly dreadlocked a lock of mira's hair.
it was so dreadful for aishwarya rai, so me and rool made annoying moans
and groans, to intensify the pain for her?lol.
dreadful dreadlocks.

then it was sheesha time again..yay!
this time, its really strong. but soon i got the hang of it.
we had a rolling good time, playing prank calls on people.
sorray, if you two got hurt, but its all in the name of fun.

" youre expecting me to wait? why are you acting like a bitch?"
"we would like you to come down for a photoshoot at our studio..."

LMFAO.

meanwhile, i gotta find a job quick.
i think i wanna go powerhouse soon. hehee.
and shisha again this sat, this time at ambrosia.
$$$till then, we're pimpin all over the world$$$

2009-03-15T19:29:00.000+08:00

met up with lovely friends last night.
everybody's became skinnier and prettier.
but im still the retarded photographer.heheheh.
forgot to ON the cam, forgot to remove lens cover, used wrong mode,
forgot to change lens, etc etc...ahahaha.

more importantly, it was nice catching up with
lingling( who is super uber duper slim rite now), zarifah,
clara, peijunjun and nisaaaa. I guess I was being an idiot
and keeps teasing peijun bout her boyfie. ahahahaha.
turns out the suggestive smooch lips chocolates were for my belated birthday!
lolololololol. so sweet la you girls.
p.s nisa, when you finally come back from the states, do send me the peektures.heh.

i think i gotta amend my to-do list, here goes:
1. apply to nus by this friday. sim? hais, application fee so expensive
and I dont even know what bloody course to take.
2. settle topshop card, annoying service lurh.
3. find a job soon cos i wanna go see Oasis live babybeh.
4. see my ns boys soon; baby and keefe bitch.
5. stop clubbing and save money for more shisha! lol.
6. go for royboyboy's gig. that fattie so busy nowadays.hehee.

2009-03-12T13:35:00.000+08:00

alot have happened since the results were released.
emomomomomomomomomomomok.

sighs...i didnt cried about it because i was still stunned
only until when i went to smoooo open house, school of law talk.
then i actually plucked up the courage to ask the lecturer
if there is any hope of me doing law with my not so fantastic grades,
it was a solemn no, then i turned away and cried in baby's arms.
i should stop crying in public seriously, stop, period.

these few days i've been in a daze. like, i dont wanna face reality.
and im saddened by people leaving meee.ahaha.
like, jac's gone off in hawaii, keefe's gonna go off to tasmania
and nikki's maybe going off to the uk/australia.
i wished i had that much money to go to an aussie university or something too.
oh wells, im glad they all have figured out what to do with their lives.
its a good thing and im happy for em.

keefe asked us out for bwoling yesterday.
it was fun then it got draggy. like, when will the game end??lolol.
keefe's friends were a nice bunch. we can hang out togther again, i hope(:

pretty nikki dickyy.

woman, if youre reading this, and you want more pics,
just go grab em at my facebook. heheh. loves.

nikki, kaixian,sharmaine and keefe bitch.
keefe just have this bitchy way of flicking his hair
and pantat gelek gelek when he walks.
so fierce~ ahahaha.loves.

then they went off, but being me, i was so restless
and in need of a little teeny weeny bit of retail therapy, just wont go home.
hehe. met up with shahrizan and treated him for shisha.
im getting addicted to shisha, i think! ahaha.
its like, giving me abit of chest pain at first,
but after awhile, i got the hang of it and i wouldnt let shahrizan shisha for long.
all mine, all mine, ahahaha.
i dont know about the average joe but shisha soothes my mind,
like helps me calm down and yaa, relax.ahaha.

i went topshop-ing, and got a pearl necklace, gold earrings and a gold rose cuff,
all for only 18 bucks. hehehe. but gasp! to my horror,
my fashionfastforward card was damaged and i would have to be
topshop/dorothyperkins- less for a month.

now that im more settled, i have this to-do list in my head. yays!

1. apply to SMU/NUS/NTU/SIM by this sunday 15/3/09, 2359h.
2. save money to buy my sis a gold watch for her birthday
(since i lost her ex's gold casio watch. fuckkkkkkk):
3. find a job and work for two months
( since i have this $25 fcuk voucher, i wanna buy something
nice for me and my momma, using my pay.heh.)
4. go for royboiboimamatcool09's band, The Melfraps, gig in april.
5. find new shades since i lost my forver21 one! homg. sadded.
6.club at least once with ex-colleagues. by next wed, i hope!
7. get a driving license asap.
8. read the bloody manuals and learn to use a canon system,
and then a nikon system soon. by this year, ahaha.
9. get that glamourkills shirt. its a must-have for me!
10. to have fairer skin and have longer hair that reaches my asszszszszs.

till then life goes on, i shall no longer brood over the past,
$$$lead a fierce life and till then, we're pimpin all over the world$$$

2009-02-26T19:31:00.000+08:00

these few days i have been hanging out with the beautiful amiraaaa.
its like having another sister. hehee.
im just so happy this week.
1. got myself a topshop bikini( w/o pads. nti amira will nag at me again x)
2. bought for miraaa, zarifah, baby's birthday pressies already.
3. shisha-ed twice, first with shahrizan and miraaa(again, lol)
and second, with baby and his friends.
i was so nervous, afraid they wont like me. hurhur.
but it was okay. i like ria. hehe.
4. gig-ed with miraa and her friends who turned out to
be a bunch of darlings. heh.

at this point, i can confidently say life is going great.
miss baby lurh. time always pass so fast when youre with someone you
love being with. in short, time is a bitch.
and baby's gotta go for ns soon. sighs. okay, lemme rephrase
time is a fucking bitch.

nonetheless, i will spend as much time as i can with baby before he goes
off to be a man. thats my boy. ahaha.
next week double o babayyy. i was dying to club. hehehe.
and tmr is Create-Your-Own-Adventure day with baby.
cant wait to see him. gawwwd, i sound so mushy.
like, peijun part two. ahahahaha.jkjk;D

$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over da world$$$

2009-02-18T10:20:00.000+08:00

http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=423800859&albumID=670233&imageID=10705648
this is becky, one of my friends at myspace.
i look at her photos every time i log in
cos she is so beautiful, i wished i look like her.
but dammit, i was born an asian. sighs.

after reading his blog,
i realise how much of an impact i can make in people's lives.
its time to grow up, and not let others take the fall for me,
i just wish i can come to a final decision
cos i'll never know how much they' re hurting inside.
maybe i shouldnt be so lucky.

2009-02-15T13:26:00.000+08:00

my 19 birthday!
omgg, so old already,soo i wont be a teenager anymore!
sad-ded.see, nisa call me ah jie already. dey, alamak.

my family brought me to sakura international BUFFET for the first time.
cant stop eating for two full hours.
they have freakin everything, EXCEPT TOM YAM. hehehe.
and being typical singaporeans, we hide some food back in our bags.
brought back 10 tempura prawns, 10 durian puffs, (i count sey),
baked scallops, a banana and a lemon which we thought was fake.
dorts...cool eh, not bad not bad.
see my face stressed on eating.unglam eh.lol.

next up, clubbing!!! it didnt turn out well as i wished la.
people bubbled last minute and bouncer at powerhouse being a ass
and the guest deejay came sooooo late.
nonetheless, we finally got our asses into the club
and plop down some apparently NON-reserved seats.
while me,keefe and rathi bitch went to get drinks.
a jug of cranberry vodka for 27 dollars.
lucky share money. hehehe. bloody expensive.

i was trying hard to convince rool to drink.
so bad sia mai. hahahaha. sorry dearie.
but a lil vodka wont hurt.hehehe.
and i dont know if he will read this,
but rool, you have this naturally smoking eyes
which is oooh so sexy. go get attached, dammit.lol.

ahah, this is what rathi call the "clubbing" effect.
lolol.

everybody had a tight curfew that night.
mine was 5 am, but everybody had to leave by midnight.
hahaha. luckily my HOT ex tution teaher, cassim, was around.hehehe.
club with him for the second time.lolol.

he intro-ed me to his all guy friends. i was the only girl sia.
and i got a "birthday treat", a glass of scotch whiskey.
hmm, kinda nice, better than gin. heh.
then before i know anything,
i was sexayyy dancing with cassim and whispering things
in his ear alot of times like , i think youre hot.
yeah, he has a hot bod, checked already that night. wtf. lololol.
and cassim was so nice, making sure i was a having awesome time
and getting me food and a hot drink before sending me home,
so i wont smell of alcohol. aww, wished i could
have him as a brother. hahahaha.
gosh, if nikki read this,
she will be like, "you and cassim have something going on isit?''
and roy would smack me on my head. hahaha.

i wanna thank everybody out there who wished me happy birthday
and those who spent time with me
and for the amazing gifts you beautiful people sent.
thank you so so very much, treasure each and everyone of you(:
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo.

okay now i officially HATE powerhouse
MOVIDA is sooo much better!!!!
woohoo. *strips for joy*
when shall we club again? hehehexD

today, shahrizan bringing me out for my birthday, yay.
hehehe. then, hopefully tyler.
and waiting for roy's birthday surprise dammit.
hahahaha.

2009-02-10T00:44:00.001+08:00

me and my momma pundek..
was looking for this photo for ages.
cute eh, my momma's shorter than me.hehe.

went to zoukfleamarket with miraa baby,
satisfied with my buys, she treated me for dinner
and talked about boys,boys,parents,boys,boys,
aside from all the jokes, i really hope
one day both our parents can mend things together again.

i wanna go kl with cuzzies,
but parents are dodging that topic all the time.
reason? they dont trust me going overseas on my own.
then how shall i enter uni next time?
are they cuckoo?

im feeling abit emo these days..am thinking,
maybe im making too huge of a fuss for my birthday,
like, in the end, i think not many care,
im the one being my usual annoying, self-high, hyperactive self..
its kinda sucky to know you can be forgettable
and mean so little to others soemtimes...
and momma dont want me spending too much,
but but im using my own pay money..
i've lost all birthday mood already. period.

today, my sister asked me for a hug, (weird?)
just ignored her as usual, and she said she loves me,
and i was like, yeah right, you love your friends/fans more.
stop it, seriously, all these fake fronts. it just feels worse.
have you ever missed someone so much that
you cry even looking at their pictures online? i do.
im more emo than an emo hotboy.(like alex evans)
bleargh!

2009-02-07T00:41:00.000+08:00

post massiomo-dutti life has been great!
hanged out with ex colleagues and i was the oldest laa.
what the hell.
and we had supa dupa fun.

played in the arcade and went crazy...deprived childhood ah.
lol. i think i just enjoy shooting and racing games ah.
like the violence and the speed yaw..
ahya, actually alot of retarded photos..
dont know why cant upload... annoying.
but i watched bride wars.. its so cheesy white chick film... yawns.
they forced me to watch lor...tahan all the way.lol.
i just had this sudden urge to marry after the movie..lol?
WHO WANNA MARRY ME???
babe solo~

then then, i went to ssdc to learn driving this morning
and serene suddenly came from behind and tapped me
heart attack neh~lol.
driving has been quite boring actually.
i was hoping for an accident or collision to happen.
cos i m still sooo sleepy in the morning! lol.
so sleepy that i forgot to overtake sometimes THOUGH THERE'A STATIONARY VEHICLE JUST SMACK RIGHT IN FRONT MY FACE!
forgot to check blind spot, engine stall in the middle of an uphill slope.
lol. after driving, went to admiralty park.
it was awesome(:
everything transformed into mini malaysia.
beautiful...quiet and untouched...serene.
then suddenly walked out to
a prison camp and drug rehabilitation centre??
dorts...

walking along the straits of johor
and hearing him talk about the struggles of world war I/II..
i feel so lucky and grateful i dont have to go through that..
people out there who is trying ( by all means; physically,
socially, religiously) or even thinking of disrupting the peace
and goodwill left scarce in this world, should not even exist.
peace~

2009-02-01T11:18:00.000+08:00

You are 67% Bittch!

Wow! You really are becoming a real Bittch! Has anyone ever told you that? I think you need to calm it down! Before you can't turn back from being a big Bittch! Being Cruel isn't that fun!

How much of a B*tch Are you?
Take More Quizzes

hahahha.got this from peijun's site.
so funny! am i really that baad? lol.

2009-01-20T23:46:00.000+08:00

it was my first time to marina barrage!

lol.personally, its a nice place to bask in the sun
and admire the sky and and, lie down on the grass.
it was a hippie-ya-ya day.heh.

taken by me! hehe.
CAN SOMEBODY TELL ME WHICH SKY IS NICER?
lol.

taken by tyler dingding.

i took this shot cos of the black dress the woman was wearing,
but alas, a random guy just had to spoil it.

baad lighting la, help?

overall, monday was like a rollercoaster ride.
feel so happy at one point to being reduced to tears
to bursting out in laughter again.
what am i feeling, Fate?

2009-01-14T01:19:00.000+08:00

dslr-ing at chihese gardens.
here are some photos i took:
nice or not? lol.

my favourite:

okay, im beat for now.
but happy(:

2009-01-09T17:19:00.000+08:00

one night of love
nothing more nothing less
one night of love
to put my head in a mess

is that you in the bus
is that you in the train
you wrote your number on my hand
but it came off in the rain

if i only knew your name
i'll go from door to door
searching on the crowded streets for the
face that i once saw

if i only knew your name
i'll go from door to door
tell me have you seen
the boy i met just once before?

mystery jets feat laura marling~

did i do the right thing.
am i really too scared to step out of my comfort zone.
i wasnt like this all the time.
am i really different? have i really changed?
is this the type of person i want to be.
do i take time to step back and listen to people
and myself, even.
do i end up hurting people even more,
or worse, without realising it.
am i using people, to fall back on..
is my nature that horrid. what have i turned into.
its so complicated, my head hurts. i dont know what to think anymore.
:/

2009-01-04T14:21:00.000+08:00

went to botanic gardens.
fun, as usual.

credits:durden

went dslr-ing.
here are some photos i took.
so amateur, i know, but heck.haha!

2008-12-24T00:59:00.000+08:00

photot credits: durden.

finally for once, model for a day.lol
that day was fun.
(:

2008-12-19T10:56:00.000+08:00

after work, went clubbing with cuzzies and friends babayyyy.
butter factory was fuckin' awesome.
as usual, got abit wild.

me and the sexayyy roool.
it was so fuckin packed, we resorted to dancing on top of a box shit?
lol.

there we are, doing our thang.haha!
like some couple laa.lol.

this is the only pic where my face looks normal.
hahaha.the rest all unglam la.lol.

this is totally, my favourite photo,
plus, with the very beautiful miraaa too;DD

i have this usdden urge to hold my birthday party at powerhouse ah.
like, i want vip treatment for me and all my friends.lol.
maybe its possible, since im earning money now.
hahahha.we'll see, we'll see.

$$$$till then, we're pimping all over the world$$$$

2008-12-17T00:23:00.000+08:00

today was a happy day.
i finally got a proper handbag all for myself. all mine. mine.
hahahaha.
come to think about it, i think i should have bought the aldo one la.
ahya. forget it.
sighs. dammit. i feel so bad cancelling on the clubbing date.
shiat.
never mind, next time:powerhouse, here i come.hahahha.

work has been tiring. my legs are killing me dot com.
how i wish i have a husband to come home to
and he will massage my feet and prepare my jacuzzi bath
(full of bubbles and lavendar soap),
then i will sleep in his arms (with air-con) on a bed all 100% silk.
lol. wtf with the mushy mushy mood. dorts.

actually when im working at the boutique, i sometimes act as though im the customer.
lol! i will pretend to be checking the clothes, but in reality,
i will be browsing the clothes i like and memorising the prices.
like, there's this 100% silk ultra chic boho dress thats like 265 bucks.
its hot la..i've been eyeing it for two days already.
you can see my facial expression change whenever
a customer enquire me about it. wtf.hahaha.

talking about boho, i've been using the same old phrases everyday
like, " this is very chic boho.", " this is the bohemian look",
"oh its so boho." and " this is very modern bohemian style".
and flattering the customers like "oh, it matches your skin tone",
" it even goes with what youre wearing now" and " you look lovely, m'am".
ugh. in reality, im envying you people to have money
to buy all this exquisite shit. dammit.

there was this old caucasian lady about 50 years old who walked in, she's so hip, i swear.
she asked me to help get her skinnies and a black bomber jacket
and i was like, "oooh m'am, youre going for the rock chic look. thats hot."
and we broke into giggles. talk about cool, girlfriend.
hahaha.
there was this particular colleague who i seems kinda annoyed with.
she's like trying to snatch customers from me,
and keep me busy doing other things.
i just let her do what she wants la eh.
i mean, if you wanna be competive just to earn commision...
no comments.
i dont really like her cos she reminds me of jc.
i bet she's a jc girl too. competitive shit.
dammit, i swear i dont belong in jc.lol.

im worried that i wont be able to last when sales start.
if i die, please bury me with black aldo heels, my handbag and
clothed in that $265 silk dress
( with la senza pussycatdolls edition undergarments included).
thank you.hhahaha.

$$$$till then, i cant go pimpin all over the world,
cos my legs are achinng marn.$$$$

2008-12-09T22:30:00.000+08:00

i miss reggae songs,haha,do you.
especially gasolina. dammit i just wanna dance dance dance in a club right now.
i wanna make love right now na na na lol.
had a fight with mum again. its so....urgh. forget it.
today's just not my day...
sometimes i really wonder, that, in the end of the day
its all my fault, like, i was the big bad bitch behind all this afterall.
i dont want to take people for granted, but sighs... heck.

i just had a resume request from some shenton way company.yay!
now, where did i put my o level cert...
darn, i think i accidentally threw it away last month while clearing my jc stuffs.
sighs. what the hell is wrong with me.
:/

2008-12-03T02:02:00.000+08:00

im sitting here in only my class t-shirt and
my new topshop thongs,
and i wonder...tampines junior college was quite fun after all.
i hope i didnt offend people in school,
if i did i sincerely apologize from the bottom of my heart.
i didnt mean to, i just cant control myself...
if you still dont like me, here's _l_ to you.
okay whatever, here comes the fun part.

wooohooo!
it was prom yawwww.
it was fun, hot, heavy and downright horny.
hahahaha.
everything's raunchy with maizuraaa around.lol!!

the hottest clique in school,
xoxo to you guys;)

the smartest ass in school.

my boss during those SL days.
sighs~

me and the sexy ubhav.
i like him cos he always say im hot whenver i see him.
ubhav! your girlfriend is one lucky womaaaaan!!!

me and nikki got all touchy on the couch.
we should appear on vogue la babe. hahahah.

i got close to keefe.
i look like his wife trying to seduce him after work.
oh well, i can be your seductress. hahahah.

keefe, come back here
( in the sexy deep tone.haha!)

there we go.
lol.

i like this pic(:

me and the beautiful nikki.

still clinging onto keefe.lol.

this is random.
lets not talk about this kays guys.lol.

me and gunna~
eh dont we look so hot together?
we should have been prom king and prom queen laa.
and he even saved my pic on his handphone!!
awwww.

me and zen!

ohhhh, do you want me?
you want me piece of me?
ohh zen, stop it stop it. lol.

crashed at tjc post prom at dxo babayyy.
we were like the partystarters.lol.

and off we rushed to zouk.
omg, we are all certified party animals.
i always get especially high whenever they play "destination unknown".
woohooo!

im dying to go st james powerhouse again like fuck.
it keeps ringing in my head,
"want to go clubbin....want to go clubbin...."
shall go job-hunting asap to satisfy my new found desire.
lol. want go zoukout laa. must find money and the perfect lie for my parents la.
LOL.

$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over the world$$$

2008-11-29T09:40:00.001+08:00

only one word to describe last night.
BRILLIANT.
can we do this again.hah.

2008-11-26T10:18:00.000+08:00

i feel like getting a fisheye 2.
heh.
im having serious bouts of self-hate again.
sighs. shall not rant about it here.
its because of my parents la. dammit.
my parents are acting so childish and annoying la.

apparently, they went to malaysia late one night, and they had to miss
their favourite indoneasian soap drama tv show,
so momma asked me to record it on tape for her while she was away.
okay fine, i know it starts from ten pm, so i just left the tape recorder on
till around midnight, cos i dont bother to keep watch over it.
then she got home around the same time, and screamed madly at me,
for what? because the show was over and i left the tape recorder on.
then i told her, well, at least i recorded the whole thing and you
never told me what time to stop.
and guess what she did.

she grabbed a stool and those foldable chairs and hurled it at me.
she screamed and threw things at me.
then i shout back, "its just a tv show. youre overreacting la kay."
she just keep throwing things and almost wanted to beat me up with the belt kay.
i just wanted to leave home at that point in time
and go to that carpark and cried my heart out like last time.
gosh, it even brings me to tears writing this.
just have to get this off my chest.

my dad is another case. i was speaking to him about, when can i resume
driving lessons again. then he talks about irrelevant stuffs like recession,
inflation, barrack obama...etc...etc... when i asked him again,
he said i gotta wait cos he has no money to pay for my driving lessons again.
okay fine, i can understand. i have all the time in the world to wait.
but, then last night he just bought a dvd player for about 250 bucks
for what? to record the stupid indoneasian tv show on cd.
he explained saying, it was cheap and on sale.
ohh, driving lessons are cheaper dad, like about 100 bucks.

retarded la kay. am i a very demanding daughter?am i?
am i too materialistic for them? i dont get it.
at least im not like my sister, who keeps demanding for dslr,ipod.
you dont need to have an ipod, or some bloody dslr la kay.
to me, its what inside that counts.
like, so what if i dont own an ipod till now, what matters to me
is what kinda hot and rockin' music i have in my handphone.
and so what if i dont have a dslr, i have a sony cybershot (which is currently missing):
but heck, it can create some great effects too and it
doesnt have to take sharp or clear images.

i wanna get a job asap, so i wont have to see my parents most of the time.
i saw a job vacancy at forver21. i dont mind cos its very convenient for me to go vivo.
but like, im sure they will only hire pretty girls with flawless skin,
which leaves me out of the category):
i've always wanted to be like, a style advisor at topshop or river island.
ohwells, i guess i was never cut for the boutique industry.
i dont want the f&b industry either.sighs.
maybe some admin job, i guess.

at the same time, i feel kinda guilty that
i should be doing something productive, like there is 80% chance i wont get to
a local university and i would have to repeat jc again.
i guess i dont mind it anymore, seriously.
i have only myslef to blame. i know i could have worked harder for a levels.
i guess i kinda lost most of my fighting spirit after prelims.
like battling a lost cause. its okay la, i guess.

i think its because back in sec 3 and 4, i have two great friends beside me in class.
whenever im not sure, i juts have to turn to the side and zhiling
can explain to me everything again and again.
or jamien beside me will always ask me, "hey did you understand or not?".
i had so much help from my teachers like,
mr siew who would teach me till ten pm during those night study programs,
come to house every weekend to teach me math.
and mrs ho, who had confidence in me.
and mr leong who will patiently sit beside me and teach me slowly.
and miss lim who gave me the confidence to not give up biology
although i kept skipping her bio lessons.

jc is like, suddenly, no one is there to help me automatically.
its like teaching a baby to walk, then suddenly throwing the baby into the water to swim.
and like, im surrounded by smart people who are all competing with each other.
jc tutors dont have so much time to spend with you
and i always feel like, its every man for himself.
many times i skip school to avoid facing all these stress.

now i know whats a levels like, i think i can take it again.
and i can do better and handle the stress better.
oh god, though i think you hate me but i dont mind that you do,
i will just say a prayer that i just wanna do well enough to repeat jc again.
i dont wanna be stuck with no where to go.
thats all i ask for.that will be the best b'dae present.
yeap.

2008-11-21T16:21:00.000+08:00

ahh. the definition of perfect.

met up with my two very sexy and drop dead gorgeous cousins
for like almost after a decade?? wtf.
i know. main aim was to go for awal's band "gig".
the best "gig" ever. woohoo!
great place. great music. great people.
we should hang out more often. heh.
now poly exams eh. dont know la eh.

anyways, after the last muthafarkin' a level paper,
had breakfast with my ladies.
we were supposed to play the bumper cars at tm.
alamak havent start operating la.
and someone was being a major bitch.

whatever, seriously. nothing is gonna spoil my post-a levels mood.
anyways, last night was my first time steeping into M.A.C.
heh. i had a gay to give me a make-up makeover,
but she had to hurry cos the shop was closing,
so i could only get the matte lipstick.
darn, she wanted to help me with the smoky eyes effect.
shes so sweet and pretty. wish she was my brother.lol.

okay. im having a major problem with accessories.
i need a fairy god-stylist! haha.
i sound like some cheerleader bitch getting all hyped up about prom.
wanna club at st james powerhouse so bad.

$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over the world.$$$

2008-10-13T23:48:00.000+08:00

WARNING:

retardo on the loose

eh where the hell is keefe?
he's like, supposed to get in the shower with me.
!$#!$@@!#!~$!!

never mind, i shall pose solo then.
sexayyyy.

ohh there he is, beat from running away from me.
heh.
the bitch with that hair.

met up with my favourite desperate housewife,
nikki longoria. hahaha.

then still feeling horny from the 'shower',
me and nikki got all touchy and all that
and we're up to bed.

exhausted from all that lovin',
i sat down on this swingy like chair
and it actually stretched all the way down to the floor,
proving how heavy my ass is.

its okay, i still love my ass...
oh my, i should be off studying now.
$$$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over the world$$$$

2008-10-13T23:24:00.000+08:00

i think i have serious problem with cameras.
its either i dont smile right,
or my eyes will be closed.

few things on my mind:
1. find a fucking bohomod prom dress.
2. work at f21 after a's and earn back money to repeat a levels next year.
3. cut bangs.
4. get rum's prezzie.
5. i need serious make up for prom.
6. tell the boy how grateful i am everday(:
7. meet up with a& a.
8. stop stone-ing.

ohwells, i've accomplished the MAJOR task of walking properly in high heels!
woohoo. you go girl!! ***spanks own ass***

2008-09-07T15:40:00.000+08:00

oooh.oooh. went to the zoo.

this is only the clear photo i took of an animal
cos my hand was shaking so much and my cam is being a bitch

and i was too, and yaa.
what is the name of this birdie , again??

ooooh yaa. it was my first time in the fragile forest.
like holy shit, the BATS and the BUTTERFLIES
are like flying free. i was like trying to take cover
and clinging onto nikki. ohwells, at least
zhiling would understand. heh.

me and my sexayy giraffes.
i was waving hello to every single animal,
then i became conscious of my flabby arms,
like oh crap, and had to hold on my fatty arms,
and wave only with one hand. yaa. retarded.

oooh. cant wait to get the photo of me humping the seal.
reminds me of that song" she shook me all night long". kinkayyy.
and the photo of me in the shower at ikea,
and screaming at keefe to ge in the picture with me,
only to realise how wrong it was for me to say
" keefe! get in the shower with me!!".
hahahahha. dammit. what is wrong with me...

happy birthday jac-o wack-o bitch-o!
one of the most sexiest and nicest gal i know alive(:
and we can be raunchy eighteeners togther gether.
(tsktsk to zhiling: keefe is the one in the middle!! :)

i like this pic. he should know why, if he still cares, that is.

i dont know why but like nowadays, i just have this sudden urge
to go to thailand. yaa random, i feel like im being drawn to go there.
me love you long time!
i think this week was full of bitching, talking about boobs, laughing,
launching project hellomai and getting annoyed at the littlest things.
i cant stop bitching and i can feel all the karma building up already.
okayyy, till today, i only managed to fast for two solid days.
its okay, shit happens.

$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over the world$$$

2008-08-28T22:56:00.000+08:00

lets dance to joy division
and celebrate the irony
that everything is going wrong
but we're so happy.

♥
today i did something on impulse
and will live to regret it. again.
i was just so fucking fed up with my hair,
i just fished out all my savings
and spent it all on my hair treatment and
all i got left with me now is two dollars. no joke.
whats more, the treatment will only last for a month.
good job , mai! best, man!

ohwells. i know i've been keeping this inside but its like
i've been a real emotional basketcase for the whole past two weeks.
like really, its just that i dont show it.
i think i have a talent for that.
but tonight i just want lash it out.for my own sanity's sake.

firstly, prelims. actually i gave up halfway through
the one week study break, like fuck this man.
im screwing up my own future man. face it,
im going to be stuck living in a hdb flat forever man.
i feel bad, because i had help, especially from cassie.
sighs. so fucking ashamed of myself. tsktsk.
so i shall mete out my own punishment:
no baybeats for you, no money to dine at nydc and online sprees.

secondly, im bloody fed up with my family.
recently had a family function, and there again,
everyone will be like bitching about the acne scars on my face.
i was born to look this way and i cant help it right.
like there was this aunt who bitch about how
i should stop eating so much seafood and even told me
perhaps i shouldnt eat anything at all.
and she even got her kids to like,
repeating the same shit to me. i swear,
i just wanted to get those bamboo poles ( that you use for laundry)
and stuff it up their bootyholes.
make it three poles for each hole, ya.
meanwhile, at home. my mum keeps quarreling with my sis.
and me, as the innocent bystander, will always get affected as well.
tonight was the final blow. my mum didnt bother to cook dinner
or take us out for dinner.
all i have in my tummy right now is the milo from morning.
sometimes, i just wish i can like live alone
with a really big fat and lazy cat as my lifelong partner
in a beautiful beachouse like in miami.
but noooo, not gonna happen, ever. period.

on a random note, mas actually wanted me to wake up at 5am
later to apply eyeliner for her friend and herself.
then i shall skip school tomorrow. i just hate school. hate college.
i think im seriously losing it.

2008-08-21T21:47:00.000+08:00

yayyy.
finally a bloody break away from mayhem.
this past two weeks been in major irritable mode.
bitch about anything and anyone under the sun,
even about the bookshop aunty.okay lets not go there.
hmm, i only have confidence for chem paper two.
cos its the only paper i can finish in time.
okay fuck school.

more importantly, i passed my final theory test babayyy.
beat that bitchass nigazszszszszszs.
one step closer to driving my volkswagon babayy.
ohwell, two years actually.
then i'll be cruising yaw.

meanwhile, i was trying to start cleaning my room.
oh my god, actually took the whole day to clear up my gp and biology notes.
theres still chem and maths.
ohwells, at least i dont have to sleep beside stacks of papers anymore tonight.
and where is that amiroooool? what about the f21 spree.
cant wait any longer. need to get back on my long awaited deprived sleep.

and people should just leave jade seah alone.
everyone says "fuck" once in a while.
i say it all the time.
$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over the world.$$$

2008-07-23T13:56:00.000+08:00

environment in the environment.
those rare gp moments.
hah. found this at photoshare. reminds me of those banglas
who always sit on random places at lil india every sunday.

today was the ridiculous college road run shit.
ridiculous cos it was raining , rain, rain.
i actually ran like, 3km. i was planning to walk la okay.
ohwells, at least i get to work off my fat ass.
my ass really fat you know. no joke.
like, protruding out of the seat by like 4cm.

i like ms nora. shes so nice. i dont wanna switch back teachers.
econs consultation is kinda crappy. she was actually snorting and laughing to herself
like a pig as we marked my essays together.
crazy pig. damn, why didnt i take geog.

meanwhile, should i study solo this sat at esplanade again

2008-07-13T12:40:00.000+08:00

it was my good ol' momma birthday.
tsktsk. i design the paperbag myself kay.
and i was trying to pose like those blog- girls selling those headbands thingy shit.
quite convincing eh.

highlight of the week:
yesterday, i dont know what came over me but i just got out of the house in
the morning and rushed to esplanade library
to study all by myself.
wow. i actually managed to did that for a good six hours+++
fancy spending your saturdays studying all by yourself in the library.
and im not alone.
there was a rjc buy studying alone beside me also. hah.
i think i shall do that again next week, no wait, every week.
i realise i have to be around jc people studying, then i will have this
sudden drive to study too. oh, maybe its just me.

horror of the week:
chemistry test, loads of homework, evolution and economics.
when i heard that she will be coming back soon,
i feel like i just died a little inside.
i dont know, i feel scared and saddened at the same time.
she just gives me this uncomfortable feeling like
i know she hates me and i dont want to have anything to do with her.
damn, she really made my life in school so much more stressful last year.
good things really do come to an end.

2008-06-21T13:47:00.000+08:00

i really wished i was a fashion designer.
like ashley isham. that is the definition of life man.
sighs.

school is starting so soon. i cant believe i wasted two weeks.
ohh the horror. so im gonna skip school on the first day.
yippie. then maybe i'll study in the airport with mummy
while waiting for mas bitch to return from beijing.
kinda miss that bitch thou.

its like, everybody seems to have gone overseas and enjoying their hols,
except me. stuck in the bitchy weather of singapore.
tried studying with keefe at esplanade for a couple of days.
and getting all stressed up and cursing and swearing
in the library. i forsee myself repeating my second year already.
ohhwells.

cassie came over last night and i learnt of some nasty shit
that goes on in the hostels of nus.
like whoa, what happens in vegas sure doesnt stay in vegas.
after he left, i did some soul searching,
like what i wanna do after my A's. i wanna learn a valuable skill.
i planned of working as a bartender, going for make up courses,
or work at a boutique like topshop!
but is its true that topshop only hire people with the looks??
if so, i guess i will lose out. i hate my face.
i wanna earn loads of money so i can go for plastic surgery one day. cant wait.
i also wanna save money for a fisheye 2 ;D
last but not least, i must learn to play the guitar
since my dad always wanted me to play hey there delilah for him.
lol. and he likes vampires will never hurt you too.

all these will keep me happy since i wont get to university anyways.
till then, school will always suck
$$$$$and we're pimpin' all over the world$$$$$

2008-06-13T07:25:00.000+08:00

met up with my good ole' friends yesterday.
what i like about them is that
they are all fun, bitchy and amazingly nice, sincere people.
but rathi still the slutty one. haha.

nisa, clara, peijun, me, ling ling and rathi bitch.

1
this is so retarded la.
we actually had to pose for every picture cos nisa said so. drama la.

3.

nisa looked very cute yesterday.
i kept touching and holding and stroking her.
sorray. couldnt help it.
maizura= lesbian potential.
no la. nothing perks me up like half naked guys on the beach.
(with the body).
talking about bodies, we were talking about boobs yesterday.
like mariah carey's boobs are so big,
she has to part her boobs in between just to eat on the table.
and when she stands, she cant see her feet cos
her ultra- huge boobs are blocking her vision.
and rathi's super bitchy way of fending off donation guys.
went to town and saw so many things i want but always no money to buy it.
it sucks la. when you're broke and you want something so much
but you only have like, five bucks in your pocket.
i want: fake white anna sui clutch bag
gladiator shoes
Charles and Keith yellow handbag
black bomber jacket
brown bohemian dress
yellow pointed flat shoes
peep toe black high heels
and i think of shoplifting those two dresses at topshop all the time.
okay la. im being a materialistic biaaatch.

ohhh. i must bitch about the teen a.k.a Xiaoyun who pose "sexy" photos of herself
on her blog to promote donations for the China earthquake.
donate more and see more of me- her tag line.
like eww. she even posted a photo of herself in her bra and panties
WITH HER UNSHAVEN ARMPIT.
and when reporters interviewed her,
she was cited saying like, i dont regret what i've done,
but i urge readers to view my body from an artistic point of view.
HOW THE HELL IS UNSHAVEN ARMPITS AN ARTISTIC POINT OF VIEW?
damn girl, you gotta set yourself straight.

okay lets not talk about her, let talk about MEEE!!!
hahaha. i passed my BTT!!! beat that, bitchass niggazszszszsz.
next stop, PDL and FTT. finally, one step closer to driving
my lifelong desired Volkswagen beetle convertible.
haa-haa-hahahaha.
feel like quitting school and just learn to drive la.
hate school .hate school.
$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over the world.$$$

2008-06-04T12:26:00.000+08:00

what id do
just to take you in
you know ill take you
somewhere deep within
id die for you
id die for you
oh yeah

prancing around the house in my first ever
hotpink g-string to class a love affair.
thats my life theme song man.
i want fandy promise me perform at my wedding in the future.
nyehehehe.

i need someone to spank me and smack me
to go study man instead of just lazing around.
i keep dreaming of lacy white blouses and high-waisted shorts and skirts and jeans.
ohno, turning to be like nikki already.lol.
today is my sister birthday.
i wanted to d.i.y a box for her to store her lomo shit films
and decorate it with gothic swirls
and burn it at the sides and what not
to make it look ultra vintage.
but no time la babe.
sighs. i shall go smack my ass and do some maths now.
and do that group v11 online quiz shit.
i feel like getting new vans shoes i saw at marina sq like only for 16.90.
omg.concentrate bitch, focus.study.

ohh.i must criticise about the fucking match between Singapore VS Uzbekistan.
wtf. 3-7????
how fuck-thetic la. i was watching the match,
by half time, it5 was obvious singapore was losing stamina
and they like to crowd around the ball you know.
they like cannot spread themselves around,
there will always be almost no one at the opponent's goalpost.
its always like that. yea, i have studied the way they played.
there is something terribly wrong. they concentrate too much on their own goalpost
but there will always be no one at the other end to score the goal.
the coach should have like, allocated at least three people
who will always stay put around the opponent's goalpost la.
not only that, the defence also not strong enough cos everyone was already tired.
i should be the coach man.hahahaha.
so humiliating laaa. no wonder so many people left the match halfway.
nonetheless, i still think precious is cute.heh.

i wanna see the next match, singapore vs saudi arabia on 14 june.
soccer date anyone?? haha.
till then, we pimpin' all over the world.

2008-05-25T21:09:00.000+08:00

every day of our lives are now worth it,
we're so worth it.

yeah.cos we only get to live once.sad.
anyways.im not sad.im nervous la.
i have so many things going on.

tomorrow is two e-trial tests.
i havent touch that driving book for months.
eleven june is my basic thoery test.
woah.if it were to happen again a bangla sit beside me
during the test and passed but i failed.
i would be speechless and pissed again man.

momma's been really nice w.r.t. gss.
walking around warehouse and telling her my prom theme.lol.
im just trying to get the perfect high-waisted shorts.
i was thinking of d.i.y-ing it.
maybe i should.

having econs for a whole week.
i hate econs.i wished i had taken geog.
its like trying to understand history in hindi or something.
thinking about it, my life is full of shit studies.
its like whenever i listen to local radio,
people will all be like dedicating songs to their friends
about good luck for this shit test and all those exams shit.
and people will all be cramping in fast food chains studying.
it think this doesnt happen in other countries.
its so typically singaporean. its sad la.
no wait, it just happen(ed)....haha.

nonetheless, we should be grateful.
for this shit top notch education shit.
cos like i remember, long ago.
some random person chat with on msn. he was from bata*.
he was telling me about the increasing levels of teenage sex in singapore.
and that he think the reasons are that developed cities like singapore
are bound to face this problem.thats why.
so i was pissed and i said back:
oh well. perhaps your country isnt developed enough.
take that biaaaatch.

$$$$till then, we're pimpin' all over the world.hah.$$$$

2008-05-11T23:18:00.000+08:00

happy mama~ day

rushed from newyorknewyork
to garuda at vivo.
all for my mama day dinner.

its me and my mama, bitch.

hah.

the singapore flyer.

this weekend is hectic one man.
i got a backache, leg ache, eye ache
everyhting ache
okay perhaps not a heartache.
all i desire now is a pass for econs test.

2008-05-05T13:57:00.000+08:00

smash girls smash boys
turn them on electric toys

ohwells.skipped school today.
lazy laa.lol.
this week is such a test-y weeks.
two big ass chem and econs tests.
cant wait for this week to be over man.
and get cheap buys at lime flea market.
want vintage dresses, bangles and shoes.lol.
i dont know but i sorta craving for a fisheye 2.
and iron man is a great movie.
i wish there was a real iron man in this world
and just kill off those middle east perpetrators , terrorists and what not.

speaking of the middle east, i was reading this new article
about how this rape victim is charged for adultery???!
wtf. it was some woman who was sent to some Afghan man
who abused and raped her for many days
and killing her toddler son right before her eyes.
then, one day she finally managed and escaped
and report to the authorities.
but they jailed her up and charged her for adultery instead.
and she gave birth to the rapist's daughter in prison.
the reason is, she has been with the rapist for several nights
and it is an offence to run away from home.
wtf. cant you people it is her being abused,
the fucking guy insert his dick forcefully into her dammit.
one of the locals even said that he would kill his wife if
his wife goes out to the bazaar without his permission.
fucking warped sexist culture.

i cant take it la. men treating women this way.
its madness.
mai=* feminist in the making. lol.

2008-04-26T22:51:00.000+08:00

annoying twats.

sheesh. after a week of angst and mayhem in school
(due to some inconsiderate/self-obsessed/turn-off people),
i got a lil piece of heaven
at nydc cafe just now with the totally awesome mudpie
full of chocolate, oreo, caramel, coffee, almond nuts and goodness.
i dont know how but it just tasted so good
all in one big ass slice of cake.
all thanks to priyaa darl,
she's the perfect food partner laa.
we can become fat asses together one day.
oh no, jac would be scared of me by then.lol.

but karma does exist eventually.
went home broke again, white bruises/ blisters on my feet
but all a happy woman.
i think thats what old friends are for,
those really long lasting kind
whom you wont forget each other.
where we just laugh and talk about the smallest slightest things,
just make you feel nice and warm inside.
yeap. now im ready to face school again.
you go girl,
*spanks my own ass*

2008-04-21T21:09:00.001+08:00

Fully alive
More than most
Ready to smile and love life

too bad. im not loving my life. life= studying+ stoning+ bitching + stressing up.
so many things to do in so little time.
cant wait for all this shit to be over.
sometimes im just so sick of all this that i would randomly keep quiet in school
its killing me dawg.

cassie keeps pestering me to study harder,
and ask me whether i wanna go uni or not.

i couldnt answer immediately,

im just confused cos im sick of studying anymore.

i wished i was in a poly or M.I or smth.
okaay.reality check here
.

i realise im stuck, doing smth that i dont really wanna do,
my life is screwed man.
okay whatever.
at least i know i have friends and teachers who care.
anyways, i wanna get a new bag, new shoes, new dress, high waisted skirt/ jeans.
i wanna design my own shoes and my prom dress.
wth. yaa. i cant be bothered to go singfest this year anymore.
oh man. im turning into the ultimate noob.
i need direction in life, seriously.

abd the authorites are negligent to let mas slamat escape laa.
i mean you should have put 24 hour security cameras
like almost everyhwere that that fucked up place right.
dont bother looking for him here laa,
he already escape to indoneasia laa.
crippled man also can escape.
wow. amazing. great job.

2008-04-09T18:53:00.000+08:00

♥
i realise i've been quite moody nowadays.
i should stop it la. cos nothing can be done about it anyway.
i will just carry on life and waking up to fuck school everyday.
sighs. ding ding is so so so annoying today.
i think she doesnt like me.
oh well.most teachers dont, i guess.
im wearing socks period.
does that mean i should i quit jc and go to another school?
just because you cant see my socks??
do you know how cutting for you to say that?
are you effin blind? blinded by your painfully irritating
i-wanna-sound-like-a-british-schoolteacher accent??
she's like living in her own world laa, her own era.
ewww.scary.

anyways i should stop bitching la cos karma is for real.
i dont know why i love dreaming and stone-ing so much.
guess whats in my head whenever i lose focus in lectires in school.
this is what would be in my head:
if i could ever be reincarnated and reborn again, i wanna be..
1. a top french fashion designer with balenciaga, yves saint laurent and what not
2. be in a classic rock and roll band like the distillers!
3. be a haute cabaret dancer
4. tall and stunning model for victoria's secret
but no...im born as some boring malay girl living in dull singapore.
ler...
then reality sinks in.

2008-04-06T22:10:00.000+08:00

wassup nigaaaazszszszsz.
i was trying to study yesterday.
but cannot laa.
cant focus. just slept the whole day.
then i suddenly remembered every saturday get clubbing hits.
so i woke up and move ma bodayyy.
and i dance and dance to dj andrew nonstop babayyy.
respect that guy yaw.

so i just did a lil bit of poisson tutorial
and finished binomial.
and grabbed some plain paper and start doodling
and swirling
and tada, my masterpiece.
actually got the inspiration from my necklace.
i love drawing ;D

this is like my interpretation of a french slut.
heh.

look momma.
i have HOTPINK GUMS.
haute yaw(x

met up ling2 and peijun today.
off to island cremery.
the horlicks ice cream is the sex la.
hah.
cant wait to go there again soon.
hate going school):
allergic to school.

2008-04-02T14:28:00.000+08:00

sex drugs and blah blah blah

sighs.been feeling down these days.
haha.
frens asking me mai are you okay.
okay laa.not really.
its just that im feeling
sad,confused,pissed,uncertain and just blaah.

anyway,on a more important note,
i saw an angmoh EMO HOTTIE at town last week.
so hot.so cuuute.
nyehehehehe.
he had like a real long fringe and he was smiling
with his crutches. awww. so cute.
many things turn me one.
heh.

oh wells. recently, i've just been upset about my results and all.
i got ungraded for everything except chemistry laa.
bio:U, maths:U, GP:U, econs:U and taking chinese b now.
sucks man.
i think about it, i really like no hope ah.
thats why when ms leo gave us that slip of paper
which asks why do you think you scored blah blah for bio.
i wrote this" forgetful stupid. born dumb. i cant help it. i dont know."
sighs. sighs.

anyway, i think i met the nicest stranger recently.
who offered me her umbrella during that awful rainy gloomy day
and hugged me and we ran across the road together.
aww.spread the love around yaw.
♥

2008-03-08T23:09:00.001+08:00

long ago back in the eighties
there was a girl named maizuraa.

alone she waits under the void deck
for her long lost love..
super mario.

until one day she fucking fed up and
tried to look like super mario herself.

okay.the wedding was boring.
i was pms-ing and anti-soical-ing all day
from morning till ten pm laa kay.
then she had to spoil my mood again by asking again,
"so hows your face?"
felt like blasting a bazooka right smack in her face.

2008-03-07T17:28:00.001+08:00

today i got back my a levels chinese results.
only two words to describe how it went:
HOLY FUCK.

its like i passed my oral but failed my written paper.
no wait.its not even a fail.

its so bad its like fuckin UNGRADED.
UNGRADED. UNGRADED.
UNGRADED.

dammit laa. guess im switching to CLB.
wif good ol' keefe.
i should be able to pass CLB right.
sighs. chinese has made my life miserable for over a decade already.
take it away. i cant take it anymore.
holy shit laaa.i cant tell my parents about this.
seriously hate that language.
i cant stand it laa people down there lamenting about
how they should have gotten an A or B for chinese instead of a C .
fucking annoying laaa kay.
im struggling with this fucking language like forever laa.
stupid moe want to force us to be bilingual.
stop forcing people dammit.
jac wasnt feelin so good about her results so i gave her a
good ol' mamma hug.
now, who's your momma now??? (in hardcore nigga accent)
hehehe. me laaa bodoh.

hmmm...speaking about government issues.
i havent start bitching about the mas selamat motherfucker.
its so ironic that his name consists of the word,"selamat"
which actually means safe or smething in malay.
people like him ought to be gas-ed and butchered to death.
yaaa, he and his JI crew too.
fucked up crew.
so disappointing that he actually got away
the man is fucking limping laa.wtf.
retarded.

okay on a lighter note, or random note.
i simple love the tracks on my blog yawwww.
heh. my limewire broke down laa.
so annoying. how to download songs for free now.
shit. econs paper was like crap today.
how can i fucking forget the short run phillips curve.
rape that phillips guy ah.dammit.
hahahhaa.
maizura~the serial rapist.

omg. im talking crap again.
and self- entertaining my self again.
ahya. hate chinese and economics laa.
its okayyy.
im going to kak nora's whatverrrrr wedding tomorrow.
my parents actually forced me to be present la.
its okayyy mai, you will get through the pathetic-ity of the wedding.
i dont even effin' care laaa.
evrytime meet that aunty, she just will be bitching about the acne on my afce
she never fails to do so laaa k i swear.
evry hari raye she will like bitch about the acne on my face.
like, what the fuck is her problem???
beauty is not everything you know,
talking like a total blonde laa.
at least i wont be like your daughter who is marrying so freakin young at 23.
when i marry, i will be over 25 and my wedding will be
held lavishly in a hotel or smething.
buek.buek.
just get away from me.
talking abouit my acne really drives me into depression one laa kay.

its okay mai,
your face is getting better.
you will go for your facial tomorrow
and show em who's your momma now???
hehehhe;))

2008-03-05T14:44:00.000+08:00

last night i had a pleasant surprise.
i received my first ever bouquet of flowers.
like a super belated valentine day yeap.awww.
i really never expected it.
i was so stressed up nowdays about the common test
and he surprised me with this.
awww. i blushed like like x10^infinity.
yeap.hah.

its so pretty.
hee.

2008-02-27T18:26:00.000+08:00

♥
momma's here.
hahaha.
hmm...nowadays there has been some uproar
about the stringent attire checks.
blah is forever about my skirt laa.
i pull my skirt down till only half my ass was clothed la.
she still say too short.
she wanted my skirt to cover my knees.
crazy. everyone's skirts are like way above the knees la.
retarded. i was like noob for the day man.
blah really knows to ruin my mood for the day man.
thats her trademark i swear.
annoying pregnant twat.

then, came about the prom thingy.
why so leceh must have at least ten people in a table.
and why must at least 300 ppl turn up.
those dont wanna turn up, then dont la.
save time, effort and money.
but i really want la.
i wanna have my first prom in a grand ballroom.
its like grand copthorne hotel, hello.
i wouldnt wanna miss it laa.
i really hope they wont cancel the prom just because
we dont meet the 3oo people minimum.
and seriously, i dont mean to sound like a biatch la.
but seriously, those who care too much about the food
should take a chill pill seeirously.
so what its not 100% of the food is halal or
you have to share table with non-halal poeple.
just eat laa. so fussy for what.
this is expensive hotel food la , bodoh.
just be thankful get food to eat can already.
i rather eat chinese food than the muslim menu
cos why? muslim menu=boring!!!
might as well eat at home.
lmfao.
;P